Where Do I Go When Nobody Wants Me
by Kennie Kayoz
Copyright 2015 Coyotes Publishing
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Last Little While
Over the last little while I’ve thought about packing up a bag and leaving, just walking out the front door.
But where would I go since I already know nobody would want me.
I can see it in them and hear it too.
Everyone is tired of me.
Tired of having me around.
I have amounted to nothing.
I can’t do anything for myself.
Nobody is willing to hire me.
I can’t move out, to potentially better myself.
I already know no family wants me.
I keep having a voice in my head that says “walk away”
I have yet to listen to it.
Since I have no place to go.
I don’t know if I would just want to become homeless.
Although that idea entered my mind too.
I honestly don’t think anyone would care if I did walk away.
I don’t think anyone would truly miss me.
The idea would some what be there for some people but I think they would ignore it.
Who would really care.
I doubt anyone.
I Know Your Looking
I know your looking at replacing me.
I can see it in your eyes.
I’m also reading between the lines with what you say.
Perhaps you have already found someone.
Just looking for the right time to leave me.
Whenever you want to is fine by me.
I always told you to do what makes you happy.
I didn’t think it would include me for long.
I’m just surprise it took many years.
I see how people look at me.
With the “why him” look when you introduce me
Similar to the “you can do better”
I know pushing me away from going to the christmas party is just one step.
Since you know I have trouble talking to strangers.
But yet your no different and yet your getting more and more eager.
I know something is up.
Maybe Sunday is the last “goodbye”
I always knew this time would come.
Tired Of It
I know there is nothing I can do for people to look at me differently
So I’m tired of it.
Wish it would stop.
But I know it won’t.
It’ll get worse before it gets better.
Sounds like everything else in my life.
While people sleep, I’m awake.
I have trouble sleeping.
Too much on my mind.
That I don’t want to share.
Even if I did people wouldn’t believe me.
They would only act like they listen.
To think I don’t know the difference.
Too bad that I do.
It’s the way you’ve been over years.
Barely listening, just to brush me off.
I know how that is.
Got no friends to turn to, so I can go stay with them.
They all showed there true colours in high school.
Would rather have nothing to do with me.
So as they distanced themselves.
I distanced myself.
They’re so far in the past, I can’t see them.
Guess they weren’t true.
Got no where to turn to.
I guess if I did leave I would be homeless.
Get lost in the crowd
I can already see that as my future.
Had plans for my future.
It all fell through.
Now I have no plans.
No where to go.
Completely lost in life.
Makes Me Wonder
At times it makes me wonder
Is there anything better for me.
Am I looking left when I should be looking right.
Is the path to a better life that close.
Or doesn’t it exist.
I use to want to believe it does.
But as of late it’s further from the truth.
I think no matter what path I choose.
One outcome will happen.
If my life was a magic eight ball
It would read “outlook not so good”