Shall I Open To God?



Shall I Open To God?












Thank you to my spirit guides who have only shown me patience, compassion and understanding and are constantly attempting to guide me to more love and truth. Thank you for your assistance on my life journey.







Copyright © 2017


Laura Berry


All rights reserved.


ISBN – 978-1-326-92876-6






Table of Contents



Introduction (7-11)



Are Humans The Pinnacle Of God’s Creation? (13-48)

Are We More Complex Than The Life Around Us? (15-22)


With These Hands (23-26)


The Choir (27-29)


Our Caring Selves (30-32)


The Desire To Know (33-37)


Our Ability To Heal (38-42)


Conscious Intentions (43-45)


Reflections (46-48)






Is God Our Parent? (49-92)



Earthly Parents Vs God The Parent (51-58)


Personal Communication (59-63)


Nature Or Nurture? (64-67)


Reliance (68-86)


Unconditional Love (87-90)


Reflections (91-92)




Is God Good? (93-115)


Freewill Vs God’s Design (95-105)


God’s Laws (106-108)


God’s Abundance (109-113)


Reflections (114-115)






Conclusion (116-119)




Extra Notes (120-123)











Dear reader in my previous book I was attempting to come to a greater awareness and understanding about the possibility of a creator or God-like entity designing our known universe and looking at possible evidence for such a truth. First looking at the physical universe and then glimpsing our spiritual universe and coming to a personal awareness that design was a more logical answer to the creation of the universe than random chance. That where there is a design there is a designer. I have come up against personal resistance in my journey to understand the idea that human beings, including myself are potentially the pinnacle of God’s creation. I do have a strong feeling developed through my journey so far that a God likely designed our universe, nature, animals and humans and naturally this has led me or opened me up to see the complexity in particular to the human itself. What I notice more is the complexity of universal laws, especially the physical laws governing the conditions for life and how they affect life and coming to an awareness that where there are laws there are law makers. This followed on to the awareness of spiritual laws and there complexity and it became apparent these laws are more focussed towards animals and humans rather than all the physical matter around us. This then led to the awareness of soul based laws that only governs human life and that we are so complex we have a whole set of laws pertaining to the human only.

The idea of God the parent started to surface and that if humans were the pinnacle of God’s creation then a loving parent or entity would prepare the universe for its children before creating the children. Chaos would play with life without concern or love where as a creator would plan for life with laws, care and love. My journey has naturally led me to the question are humans the pinnacle of God’s creation? Is the universe largely for us personally, the human being, and learning about our creative potential? Are we the most complex lifeform in the universe? These questions seem important to understand on some level in my heart and it has taken a year to build the desire to investigate these questions in more detail. Mainly because of many false beliefs I hold about this potential that has stopped me desiring to investigate this further such as arrogance that I am my own God, that I know better than God, that only I know what is best for me. It feels important looking back that these false beliefs and blocks had to be acknowledged and resolved to some extent before I could look at these next questions with a more open heart and mind and have some desire to investigate it. I had to accept that maybe I am still a child that is learning and that I don’t know much about what is best for me at present due to how little I know about love and God in particular. This seems to have opened up a desire to now investigate these questions. To gain more awareness about God’s laws pertaining to humans in particular with a desire to build faith through the experience that God is my parent and wants to love me and for me in turn to love. That I can trust God and start a greater friendship and relationship with God, that we are the pinnacle of God’s creation, that God is our parent and that God is good and hopefully take others through to this understanding with me.

Are Humans The Pinnacle Of God’s Creation?

Are We More Complex Than The Life Around Us?

It might seem like an obvious question but when I delved deeper I could start to see differences I hadn’t fully acknowledged. In general our physical bodies aren’t that different to other complex lifeforms on the planet with the exception of the brain. Our brains have been acknowledged by many scientists as the most complex structure in the known universe. It is easier to understand a galaxy and its contents than it is to understand the human brain. When you look closer at what has stumped scientists it is largely the control of the brain through consciousness, desire, emotion, empathy, compassion, freewill and imagination. All of which are qualities that humans possess that spark the brain into a physical response or action. The physical laws and how we understand them at present can’t explain this spiritual and soul based function and so it stumps us. However through it we can start to acknowledge that we are unique from other lifeforms due to these qualities and more powerful as creators as a result. It seems what is most complex about us isn’t physical at all but emotional in nature and the drive behind our intent and actions in the world and what drives us to create what we do.

Another aspect of human life I started to acknowledge more was our insatiable thirst to keep growing, developing and learning. Although other animals share some of these qualities we go about the execution in a different manner. We don’t share the same thirst for it. The difference I perceive is that animals are more responsive to the environment that already exists whereas humans create the environment or have the power to change the environment according to our freewill desires. We create and manifest whereas animals respond and adapt. When I looked at this I could see that humans have a large responsibility as well as the conscious power to enhance or degrade the environment whereas animals have very little power to do the same. This thought helped me recognise how powerful we are as creators on the planet for good or bad and it also highlighted desire and freewill as higher qualities that only humans seem to possess at such strengths.

If we look at the Earth in its current condition we can see that perhaps we don’t use these qualities to their best potential. We are at present quite destructive and irresponsible as a race. Some say we are instinctually more evolved animals and excuse our current behaviour because of this but if we look at what the Earth could look like and what our race could look like if we enhanced our use of desire and freewill, in a more positive direction, we can imagine a more divine creation that humans could become. For example we could choose to love ourselves, others, the environment and create in harmony with the laws around us beautiful, useful and durable homes, living with nature and animals and not against them, using science from a place of love and not from a place of ego or fear, sharing and encouraging all the positive aspects of each other and money could be a tool not a bind if it even existed at all. We would care about each other and the Earth and we would enhance the Earth’s beauty and become good shepherds and creators. This is all achievable because we all have conscious desire and freewill. We can actually choose this if we desire to. It is already in our being and we have the tools and the consciousness to use them. If we were to act this way I could start to see we could be the pinnacle of God’s creation. However due to our unloving desires and use of freewill and how hard and complex it seems emotionally to change humanity’s choices and its direction, this also highlighted how complex we are as a being purely due to our emotions and how this affects our choices and the results on the Earth, at present, are evidence of this.

It feels extremely complex to change ones beliefs and consequent actions due to opposition emotionally from the populace around us. How difficult it seems to change one, human, behaviour towards a more loving direction globally. One man could desire a world with no guns and the rest of the world could emotionally oppose him, perhaps due to the fear and false beliefs that drive a person to own one, and with a great effort and amount of time often decades, eventually, hundreds of thousands of people now agree they no longer wish for a world with guns. What is fascinatingly complex about us is our emotions and how they approve of oppose of changes in engrained or inherited beliefs within ourselves and how we can resist positive change or embrace it. In the example of guns, logically, we can intellectually see if there were no guns on the planet the world would be a better place to live in yet emotionally we oppose at often times a loving fact. This then skews our view of what we could positively create which would give us more joy and lead to our divinity.

Animals generally go towards what is good for them and what would give them the most joy instinctually whereas humans have the ability to oppose it or accept it due to emotional reasons and drives and the use of our will. From this I can accept that we are the most emotionally driven and complex beings on the planet and even in our solar system.

Rather than seeing ourselves and our potential as divine creators we see ourselves at often times as evolved animals with little more than instincts. But now I see how that can’t be true because of the fact we have desire and freewill and we can choose how we use them which is evidence we have the ability to be divine creators and the potential is there, even if it is not yet realised. If we pursued this path we could indeed reflect a divine creation and become it. So although at present we don’t reflect the pinnacle of God’s creation, if we see our potential because of our ability to enhance our qualities of desire and freewill towards love, we can see we could be the pinnacle of God’s creation and that we haven’t grown into our divine selves yet. We don’t yet reflect that in a way that is more observable and obvious but that the potential is there. So just by looking at our ability to have desire and freewill as a race I can see we could be the most complex lifeform not just on the planet but in the known universe.

With These Hands

I have been fascinated by human hands for much of my life. I find them fascinating including the potential of what we can create with them and the emotions we express through them. They are an expression of our actions. A firm but gentle touch on another’s shoulder can cause a person to surrender to grief and show compassion, support and care. A pair of hands at a piano can play heavenly music coming from the musician’s soul. Our hands are clenched when we are resistive and open when we are humble. We can stretch out our hand in charity or put them in our pockets and close down to giving. We create homes, useful objects and devices to help each other. We create the written word, art, music, poetry and dance. Our hands are truly a beautiful tool to express ourselves. With these hands we create like no other being that we know does. We often like to keep our hands busy. When you become a hand observer you notice some things. People slap or tap themselves in anticipation, drummers and rhythmically minded people can’t resist a rhythm when they get a chance, the fearful and nervous rub their hands as if washing them in invisible water, the angry or resistive will clench in a fist, the open person will gesture open hands in an exposed and gentle manner, the people pleaser will touch others and almost pat them to appease tension, the needy person will grab.

We express our emotions through our hands that I have not seen any other being do. We constantly seem to be doing this. When we don’t share a common language we often use our hands to communicate our true feelings. Our desire to create and express ourselves through them seems ever present. They remind me or take me to the possibility of our God given creative potential. I am reminded of Michelangelo’s painting ‘The Creation of Adam’ where God outstretches his finger and gifts man God’s creative ability. It is a powerful image and it is expressed through the gift of our hands.

We are the only being on the planet that can create refined work with our hands. Because of their dexterity we can be extra careful and detailed with what we create. This reflects a divine purpose somehow. That God has gifted man a more divine, creative potential and a clue perhaps to us being the pinnacle of God’s creation… a being that can potentially create worlds with these hands. This has helped me gain more awareness that we could be God’s most divine creation. However this is only another thread of truth towards the ever increasing bigger picture.


















The Choir


My investigation then led me to music and more specifically humanity’s ability to sing harmonies and chords together. When you are sat in front of a choral ensemble and the power of people’s voices and harmonies vibrates throughout your body and soul it truly feels as if we have some divine potential.

Many times when listening to choral music I have had a spiritual realisation or a soul realisation that a higher power or purpose to life must exist. I can’t explain why but what has been inspiring about these experiences is that it wasn’t nature or the physical universe that gave way to this realisation we have divine potential, or a source out there, but the human voice, a source from within, full of emotion and harmony. The purer the tones the more profound the realisation… that humans can be divine. No other beings on the planet can create such divine music, using their voices, with such harmonies. A feeling developed for me that if we are the pinnacle of God’s creation throughout the universe that this must be one of the pieces of evidence to such a case.

Why do we desire to sing? Why do we desire to create such music with our voices? Some of the reasons I found were that we get pleasure and joy from the experience, we give pleasure and joy to others through the experience, but more than that, there was a feeling that in our hearts we long to connect to God through the experience. To connect to a higher love, to remember our true purpose, our divinity, how God designed us to love and to shine it forth, a celebration, a healing, a prayer and a longing to love. I get a greater sense when listening to choirs how divine the human really is and how powerful a force for love and goodness we could be.

The choir also reminds me that when our personal differences are laid aside and we come together with a desire, for example, to create beautiful music and sing out to the heavens not just as an individual but as a group, it shows us how beautifully we can harmonise and work together to create a more divine, refined and powerful result. We can ring out love through the power of our voices and change the heavens.




Our Caring Selves


There is another quality that stands out with humans and that is our ability to show, share and develop compassion. We have the ability to be kind to ourselves and others and to be able to make moral judgements. We are capable of such acts of compassion that seemingly at times we go against our own self-interest in order to be of assistance to another who we can see is suffering. In those moments we become selfless and we may give our resources, our time and our shoulder to another. This empathetic connection to the care and well-being of others and the desire to love another and to show compassion for their situation with the intention to assist and care for them feels like another part of the picture of our divinity. The good we can do in that place is powerful. At these times we have a purer desire to see another happy. We can truly give without want of anything in return. We can look beyond ourselves and our immediate environment and have the ability to care about larger situations. For example, caring about the environment and having compassion for all living things as well as our own people. We can understand and relate and with a warm heart we can give.

We can also develop compassion for ourselves. In this place we can promote our own well-being and healing. I feel compassion is a gift from God and a quality to be developed and also points to us potentially being the pinnacle of God’s creation. We possess the ability to be compassionate in such strengths if we want to. You can feel it when you are on the receiving end of it and if you give it, such a powerful force for good that again only humans seem to possess at such strengths.

If we look around us occasionally we catch a glimpse of compassion, either coming from ourselves or others, but we fail to recognise we could be, rather than occasionally compassionate, eternally compassionate. If we were to grow into such a state we could truly reflect a divine goodness as a race, similar to that which we could perceive from an unconditionally loving God… a reflection of God in the human being. I feel our ability to care is another piece of evidence that points towards humans being the pinnacle of God’s creation.






The Desire To Know


Humans have a hunger for knowledge. We like to invent and create but more than that we like to deconstruct and understand how everything works on our planet, in our universe and even with our own bodies, emotions and minds. We want to know how everything works, how things were created and what we can create. This makes us stand out, in the whole solar system at least, as unique. We can even mull over our own existence and our divine potential. There is no limit albeit apart from our imaginations, to what we can try to learn or know.

Really this is a hunger for truth. We want to know the truth of everything even why we want truth. This hunger for truth lays in every one of us. In some it lays dormant and others more actively seek it in different areas dependent on our wills. Most of us love external truths or truths outside of ourselves but find it harder to desire to seek the truth within about ourselves. But in one way or another as a race truth and the desire to know eventually propels us through different discoveries. This desire to know doesn’t reside in the intellect or the mind but the seed or seat of desire, I have found, is in the heart or soul.

This desire to know helps us to grow ourselves into better, more loving and more accomplished beings. If we look at external truth, for example, and our desire to understand the physical world, has led us to amazing understandings and achievements. If we look at the desire for internal truth, or the truth about ourselves, we can see that in those moments we have become more responsible and loving beings, and we can continue to keep growing the more we seek the truth. It has also become apparent to myself that internal truth is what has made me into a more loving being rather than the external truth so I feel internal truth is something better to seek and has the most profound effect on my development towards love. However truth in general opens doors and expansion and we can use that knowledge dependent on our freewill choice to be loving or unloving with it.

We are the only beings in our solar system, at least, that wonders why we are here, wonders what our creative potential is and how we can expand it, wonders what good we can achieve in ourselves or the world and how this good can keep growing and be improved upon. If we used our desire to know and seek truth for good imagine what we could create individually and collectively. Deep inside we seek to better ourselves with the truth and to become more and more loving beings.

We want to become more conscious, not less conscious when we seek the truth. The thirst is never quenched. It truly is an amazing quality of the human being.

If we think about what we could do if we eternally grew in knowledge and truth, in a loving direction, the human could truly be capable of creating universes. If our life doesn’t end here but is eternal then our capability of absorbing truths feels exponential.

If God were to create a pinnacle of creation what a pinnacle if the creation can not only seek truth about the creator from which it came but also become the creator itself.

No other creation in our solar system and on the planet has that ability except the human being.






















Our Ability To Heal


If we take out humans from the planet and we observe nature and animal life and even the Earth itself we can see that if there is an imbalance the systems created or the physical laws start to correct the imbalance and heal the environment. For example, if man has a piece of land that has suffered abuse, the soil lacking nutrients, no insect or animal life exists on this land any longer, the ground is compacted and now there is no abundance or diversity able to grow or take hold. If man steps away and observes what happens is that the land starts to repair itself. Initially dry grass may appear then thistles, moss, and fungus. A bird might drop a seed and a flower appears. Some plants may take over to heal the soil and when there job is done others take there place for the next stage of healing. Insects start to return, attracted to the plants, and then mammals, attracted to the plants and the insects. The animals churn up the soil and fertilise it, spread the seeds, plant nuts and trees start to grow. The once barren land starts to become abundant with life again. The rain helps and the sun and all the physical laws work together to heal the land. As humans we can watch and observe this. Nature and animals respond and adapt to the laws naturally.

Humans can consciously choose to accept the laws or go against them. We have the ability to choose what we heal and when. We also have the ability to assist consciously in the Earth’s healing. We have the ability to assist healing and speed it up if you like. This I feel is because the physical laws respond to God’s love and the love of man, both of those in particular. The physical laws respond to our souls. That is how powerful we are as humans. If no humans existed on the planet and only God’s love and laws were there to love, nurture and heal the Earth I can imagine the Earth would respond fluidly and be a paradise. When humans exist upon the Earth and choose to oppose love and truth we create blocks to the smooth growth, transition and healing of the Earth. The gift of our will and the conscious choice to love or not love can stop the flow of love (if we choose the latter) and the healing that comes from it.

I mention this because in these reflections I feel humans have the ability to heal more than just ourselves and that there is something truly divine about the consciousness in the act of choosing love and true healing and that we are the only being that has this ability and potential. We are the only being on the planet that can consciously choose to heal ourselves and everything around us. The gift of our will makes us responsible not only for our own personal healing but impacts the healing of everything around us.

The healing I speak of is love. We have the potential to intentionally absorb and give out love into the world in great proportions more than any other being on the planet. We have a massive capacity to feel and with that is the massive capacity to not only feel negative emotion but also love in great abundance.

This makes us stand out again as a truly amazing being with great potential. That potential being to not only heal ourselves and the Earth from wrongs but to give out love and create harmonisation and abundance as a result. Although it is quite difficult to see right now on the Earth as humans have much suffering to work through which creates unloving consequences to ourselves and the Earth. We can see that if we had no pain as a race that our capacity to feel and love could be truly great.

What a pinnacle of creation! One that can grow exponentially in love and that has the ability to heal and nurture everything around it and everything the love is directed towards. If we feel about this I can see how we could be the pinnacle of God’s creation by our power to love alone.

But to see this we must temporarily forget the unloving condition of the human race and reflect on what our potential in love could be.



Conscious Intentions


What came to me after the last chapter was our ability to have conscious intention. I feel this takes the concept of freewill a bit further. Rather than just acknowledging the fact we have a free will as a race and that we can choose love or choose un-love we start to now become aware that something drives our will and that it is our conscious desires and intentions. We choose to use our will we don’t fluidly respond and adapt like nature and animals but we choose if and how we are going to respond or change in situations.

I feel at present that our conscious intentions are fuelled by the seat of our desire. Our desire is emotional in nature and very powerful to drive our intentions and then actions towards ourselves, others and the world. We also have the ability to change our desire from one that is unloving to one that is loving and vice versa. It is an amazing thing to think about.

I feel the world has accepted our mental consciousness as unique but, if we take it further, what drives our intentions is desire and emotional in nature. It takes us to the power of our emotional intentions and I believe our soul intentions.

If we are the only being on our planet with such emotional drives, longings, aspirations and intentions and that that is what the soul encompasses then in theory we are the only beings with a soul on the planet with the conscious intentions to love or not love and that makes us stand out as not just unique but the most complex design in the universe… the soul itself.

If humans have been gifted a soul with desire and conscious intentions to act on those desires then we must, theoretically, be the most complex design, not just on the Earth but potentially, in the universe and as a consequence we must be the pinnacle of God’s creation.

















I was feeling about what to write in conclusion to these first chapters and a poem came forth from my hand.


I’m God’s greatest creation

The ability to love within me

With these hands I can create miracles

With my voice I can sing out divinity


I can care with love overflowing

The thirst for truth in my soul, I can start…

To heal the wounds of myself and my brothers,

With the desire to love in my heart.


The emphasis of this poem recognising our potential, rather than reflecting it at this moment and the emphasis being on oneself, and the personal responsibility that each of us have to use our will and our conscious intentions towards good.

Many of these chapters I have spoken about with a view to catch a glimpse of what good we could be capable of if our error as a race was healed, removed or didn’t exist. When we think of humanity now it can be hard to see what we could have been designed for without our current conditions tainting the view. Also, if we can’t see the good we could become we have little motivation to overcome obstacles in reaching that goodness.

From these reflections and explorations I can see our potential to grow into divinity and that there are glimpses around of such a possibility being reality.

When I first started to write I wondered what I would find, if much, to prove to myself and others that we are the pinnacle of God’s creation. If anything, at the start, I felt I would most likely disprove this possibility and then as the reflections developed and some memories came back to me of moments I have had it showed me a glimpse of some things resembling divinity and my heart started talking. It showed me more that the evidence is around us but that our lack of desire and intention to explore this possibility can stop us from recognising what it is we are experiencing. We could look at what we have experienced already on this good Earth with fresh eyes and look for the potential good in humanity and what are qualities could be capable of. This has seemed to highlight for myself that we are indeed the pinnacle of God’s creation, unrealised, forgetful and resistant to this truth.









Is God Our Parent?



































Earthly Parents Vs

God The Parent


We can get to a place in our journeys where we can start to see that God exists, designed the universe, designed the human and the human soul and an awareness we are the pinnacle of God’s creation can start to settle in our hearts. In this place we may start to explore different avenues to start to reach this pinnacle we are now starting to realise we can become.

Many of us travel down a self-reliant avenue towards God. We try to become better and more loving we may even talk to God but we don’t open ourselves up to God. God remains outside of our self. In many of our hearts we don’t personally connect to God and we don’t feel God as part of us like a friend or a family member. We can still lack closeness to God and even though we may become better people in a self-reliant process we can stay closed to a feeling that we could have a personal relationship with God and let God in on our journeys and growth. As with all our other research we need to gain awareness or more awareness that this personal relationship with God is possible and good for us. One area I have found beneficial in my journey is looking at God the parent and relating that to our concept of Earthly parents in its purer form.

I asked myself firstly what does a parent mean? In its basic sense our parents created our bodies, gave us life, and cared for our basic needs. If God is our parent God would in theory reflect the same. We can see God created our souls which were then brought into our physical and spiritual forms by our Earthly parents. We can see that God not only gave us life but created it. God created the soul that could then incarnate through our Earthly parents. If we strip away our Earthly parents and our physical and spiritual bodies we are left with our soul and the creator and true parent of the birth of that soul must be God. We could even say if we look at it from this angle that God is our first and true parent as God created us before our Earthly parents did.

Next was does God care for our basic needs like our Earthly parents do? With this question I looked at the soul. The part we know God created. Are our souls basic needs cared for? Our soul’s needs are emotional in nature. It feels emotion both positive and negative and it holds our passions, longings, desires and aspirations. Are these needs met in my life right now? I can feel emotions, my tear ducts are evidence of this. I can laugh and feel happiness, I can breathe, I can feel sadness, shame and love and I have all the tools needed to feel independently of God. I also have resources at my disposal to be used whichever way my heart desires. The universal playground is vast. There are opportunities to go with this that helps us be able to expand on those desires. It feels like our souls needs are met and more. If we can start to look at this we can start to develop a feeling within that God is our parent at least in the basic sense. We can start to develop a feeling within that God cares about us personally.

A true parent wants good for their children. They would want to encourage growth, for them to find out who they are and for them to be independent. They would want to help us learn how to correct our mistakes and share knowledge with us and teach us to their best ability how to be a better person and guide us. On the Earth right now our Earthly parents don’t always reflect this but on some level we know this is what we would like from our parents or should be as parents. Therefore let’s look for these qualities in God to see if God is truly reflective of a parent figure to ourselves.

God has created us independent of himself and we can grow to some extent with or without God. God gave us freewill so we can be independent and make our own choices. God encourages our self-responsibility through that gift and encourages us to use it.

Next I looked at if God helps us correct our mistakes. For this I chose to look at God’s law of attraction and what I found was whenever we make a mistake or do something good we attract events to us that give us personal feedback. If we have done something unloving we may notice what some call karma come and seek us out through an event which is direct feedback about our unloving choices. The same can occur if we do something good and we will attract positive events to ourselves to show us we are on the right track. I have also noticed that our emotions are also a feedback mechanism that helps us correct our mistakes. We will feel emotional and maybe physical pain as a result of an unloving action and love and joy for a loving action. So if we look at those two things, the law of attraction and our ability to emotionally respond, both of which God created, we can see that God has lovingly placed laws that are ever present with us personally to help us grow and heal towards a loving and joyful life. We can also see how God shares knowledge with us in this way and also guides us to his best ability, because it is dependent on our freewill if we will listen or act on those things that we feel through pain or joy or what we attract into our lives. God won’t force us to listen.

There is another law of God’s or two laws, I have found, that helps us correct our mistakes, which takes the beauty of the design further, and that is the law of compensation and the law of repentance. These laws assist us to connect emotionally to our mistakes and also to see them with the help of the law of attraction as one example. Now if we engage repentance or compensation we can release and heal those mistakes with a desire to change and grow into a better person as a result. It shows us that God wants us to become loving and joyful and has placed laws to help us achieve that if we engage our will with them. If we look at these laws around us it feels like God has thought of everything to help us and guide us to use our will lovingly like a good parent would and better than what most of us have ever experienced. It feels as if God truly cares about us and us growing into our true loving selves. Maybe we can start to see that God is a truly loving parent who has provided, nurtured and guided us even if we have not engaged it consciously yet.







Personal Communication


We may look at the difference with God and our parents when it comes to communication and see that physically we can have a conversation with our Earthly parents but not with God. We feel closer to them because of the physical aspect and this makes them seem more real than God to us because of those aspects we are used to. I’ve had moments in my own journey where I feel God is elusive, silent, ethereal, standoffish and not real because I can’t see, touch or hear God in the way I can with my brothers and sisters physically. But I am starting to become more aware that God is potentially always there, it is just God sends us feelings and love and if we are not yet open to the reception of that love then we are left with God’s laws that communicate to us our truth. We don’t feel a personal communication because our hearts aren’t open to feeling God. Often if or when we do open our hearts to God, God’s love will press on our pain first so we feel pain and shut down the communication. What is happening there is that in order for us to feel God’s love and truth in an area of our lives or of ourselves, the love pushes any pain that is present to the surface because the pain acts like a plug in a wound in our soul and until we feel that pain and remove the plug God’s love can’t fully enter, heal and give us love and new truth in its place. The pain is humans creation, not God’s, so our communication with God initially may be painful and that is why we may shut down the process and the personal communication then gets lost, abandoned or avoided.

But I can see from my own journey so far that God is there always and attempting to communicate with me but my lack of desire to feel pain is what shuts it down again.

So I found that God doesn’t communicate with us like we expect with a physical conversation but rather God talks to us through feelings soul to soul and always through the emotion of love. It is the unfelt pain in our souls that stops us feeling the love initially. God does communicate with us through feelings of love and soul to soul if you like.

I’ve spent many hours ‘talking’ to God verbally without it sinking in that I am not really communicating with God effectively because my heart has remained closed. I feel it is very important for us to really realise we must open our hearts, even the painful feelings, in order to truly start communicating with God and to feel God’s response, love, healing and truth. I have found it useful to remember here that pain is finite but God’s love is infinite.

The only way I have found to personally communicate with God is if I am emotionally open and sincere about my true feelings with a desire to feel God’s love at the same time. Many of us have blocks, including myself, to open up to becoming emotional all the time. These we must work through as we keep attempting to open our hearts. The blocks are varied for everyone but all the reasons why we don’t wish to feel pain, love, shame, truth and any false beliefs we may carry about God that stops us seeing God is good not bad. So it is normal I feel for it to take some time. But as you work through them you will feel God at times and start to gain some faith that this is all possible. Our challenge in a world where emotion is judged, regarded as bad by those around us, criticised, minimised, ridiculed and opposed is to, despite that, open ourselves up to be emotional and allow it to flow so we may at last personally communicate with God in the best, loving and most joyous way. We need to know that it is good to be emotional and to connect to God in this personal and wonderful way even if it is painful at the start but we can learn to love our grief and know it leads to positive change in our lives if we feel and allow it.

So I discovered that God does personally communicate with us through feeling and soul to soul communication. Like we open our ears to hearing another’s voice we need to open our souls to feel God’s voice.



Nature Or Nurture?


A lot of us can feel like the laws around us are natural and that they help keep things in order and balanced. This is true to some extent but the laws I am starting to feel are more than that. The more I look at myself and how the laws affect me personally and the more I see God as a potential parent the more these laws feel not just outside as an ordering and balancing system but as a personal nurturing system.

The laws turn from being just science, if you like and just there, to being warm, nurturing and loving to us personally. The love from God in the laws can be felt by us and they become nurturing to our soul and selves and we can learn to love them and appreciate them. Although I have just started this part of the journey myself I feel it is important to touch upon as many of us can get to a point where we start to accept and recognise there are many laws God has created but we don’t fully appreciate them so then don’t embrace them in our journeys.

For example, most of us can accept the law of gravity and that it exists, scientifically and intellectually but do we appreciate it and feel the love in the design? Do we wake up grateful that we don’t float off into space?

I feel what has been missing for myself and others is learning to appreciate the laws we discover in a heartfelt way because when we do we get a sense of God’s nurturing and care for us and it can help us learn to have faith and love for God which in turn can help us open our hearts to God.

Discovering and appreciating the laws that God created and giving God recognition and feeling gratitude for them can be a good tool to help us connect to God and desire a closer relationship. We may oppose some laws we discover for example, the law of attraction, because in order to appreciate the law fully we have to understand the love or loving design of negative as well as positive attraction. We could learn to see and feel the nurture in the law and that it is there to help us. Then we would learn to listen to the law and include it in our lives wilfully and with desire and then the law can be of the most benefit to us and at the same time we accept a part of God into our hearts.

I haven’t reflected on a law yet that doesn’t show love in its design and where once I looked at natural law as just nature I can now start to appreciate that every law is nurture.

There are laws pertaining to the physical world, then there’s spiritual laws that govern the spirit body and spirit world and then there are laws pertaining to the soul and if we know any of them and reflect, on if these laws are nature or nurture, we can see that every law gives out love and nurture as an effect of that law. There is something loving and good about each one and we know now that love is an emotion given by an entity and that God as a result must love and nurture us through the creation of these laws which now can start to feel loving to us.

I feel this nurturance system shown through the laws is a very parental quality one that the creator of those laws we must attribute it to. If that creator is God then God’s laws reflect parental qualities.



Is God reliable? If a parent loves us unconditionally they would be a reliable guide. They would show consistency in their manner and approaches and they would be there at the crucial moments if they could. They would stick to their word and for example, if they promised to meet you somewhere at a certain time to their best ability they would keep that promise.

The problem here is that we shouldn’t expect anyone to do anything for us but a true friend and guide or parent who truly cared about another would want to keep to their promises and when we do we become reliable and trustworthy. This is something we could look for in God to help us understand more if God is truly reflective of a parent to ourselves. Can we rely on God?

The first thing I noticed when reflecting on this question was that the laws that we started investigating and reflecting on in the last chapter could help us understand more here. If we trusted those laws and can see that they only work for our benefit and that they are ever present and always functioning we can start to see that we can rely on those laws. If these laws are created by God then we can start to realise that we can rely on God.

But I feel we miss a more personal perspective or angle if we just focus on the laws, in an impersonal sense, we want to see if we can have a close, personal relationship with God and somehow we need to see that God is personally there for us and worth connecting to and opening up to. For example, can we rely on God to give us answers to our heartfelt questions? Can we rely on God to know what is best for us? Can we rely on God to guide us in every situation? Can we rely on God to not judge us? Can we rely on God to tell us the truth? These are just some questions we might have when we reflect on God reliance and is there a way we can start to eliminate these doubts and come to see God as a trustworthy friend and parent to ourselves?

Our problem is that our doubts about God as a parent or friend come from our experiences with our Earthly parents. Our doubts come from the way we have been parented on the Earth by our brothers and sisters. If our earthly parents or care givers judged us for our emotions or mistakes we put that now upon God and believe God must be the same, especially if we connect with God as a parent figure. What we need to somehow do is separate our Earthly parents from God the parent.

Intellectually we can start to see this process of separation by looking at the laws firstly and how loving and nurturing they are but also by looking at the idea of a new relationship. One that must be loving, one that confronts our view of our own parents and starts to give us a new concept of what a parent really could be, rather than keeping hold of our false beliefs about the Earth’s definition of parents and what we’ve already experienced. I felt it was important to briefly mention that our doubts come from our experiences of our own parents and false beliefs we’ve been taught about what a parent is. Am noticing on this journey that God feels different to our Earthly parents and have realised that these false beliefs need to be challenged in us emotionally and intellectually about what a true, loving parent would really do for us and how they would treat us. Have found this understanding useful even just to help me intellectually be able to open up to different perspectives about God the parent and in particular about God reliance and if we can rely on God as my negative personal experiences can close doors on new perspectives. I believe looking intellectually at if God is reliable is one way to start to challenge any doubts we have but the most important way to eliminate them is to feel the contrast between what we are intellectually discovering about God the parent and how that touches our personal pain and false beliefs about how our Earthly parents or care givers didn’t reflect that to us when we were children.

So gaining more intellectual awareness and emotional awareness about God’s reliability can help us start to go through that grieving and healing process by acting as a contrast to our personal experience.

Can we intellectually gain more awareness about God’s reliability? If we look at the first doubt I wrote which was ‘can we rely on God to always give us answers to our questions?’ What I have found is that when we ask God a question we don’t ask with just our mouths but with our true feelings. Sometimes the questions we ask with just our mouths are not what we are asking with our feelings or soul. If our words match our feelings then we feel our questions, if aimed towards God, get answered almost instantly but if we ask one question from our lips but feel a different question from our soul it is the soul longing that gets answered not our words or intellectual thoughts. When I started realising this I started noticing that at often times I ask God a question with my intellect and mouth but my soul is either closed or somewhere else but if I looked at events around me after, through the law of attraction, I could see something was being answered at times but it wasn’t anything to do with my verbal question but what my soul was crying out for if you like or longing for. So at often times I think God is elusive and doesn’t listen to me or is unreliable at answering my questions (or prayers) when in reality it is me not listening to my souls longings and desires and therefore I am not conscious of God’s answers. But the more we connect with our souls longings and feelings the more we start to ask questions from that place and then when we do we start to see that God always answers. We also have to be mindful of the fact we may not like the answers so we could ask God a question from our soul sincerely but then we could dismiss the answer we didn’t like. So the key here is to experiment with getting in touch with our souls desires and longings honestly and notice what happens when we do and ask God questions from that place and also notice what happens when we don’t. Have found this a good way to start to see that God does answer our heartfelt questions as long as we are connected to our true feelings we will always receive the answers and then we start to see that God is reliable in this area.

For example, I could ask God ‘I want to give up smoking. Why can’t I?’ and the next day somebody gifts me a big bag of tobacco they don’t want anymore. I might then feel God is sadistic and didn’t answer me. What happened there was that I wasn’t in touch with my real feelings. My real feelings were saying ‘I want to smoke. I don’t want to face this yet.’ and so my question could have been ‘Why do I want to keep smoking? Why do I still enjoy it?’ because the truth was I still want to and my soul still longs for it. The truth is I still see it as a good thing and why? That would have been a purer question to God and more in harmony with my souls longings and when I received the tobacco it would have had a different effect on me as an answer from God. I may have felt ‘wow I really want this tobacco to the point people gift it me.’ Then that event may have sparked some emotions or a new soul question or longing to really get deeper into the issue and the emotions driving the behaviour. But when we ask the question from a place out of touch with our soul we won’t receive the benefit of the answers or may believe we didn’t receive the right answers or maybe even no answers. I feel God is reliable with answers and that we can keep doing these experiments to eliminate our doubts there. We can also reflect on previous experiences and occasions when we felt we have asked God for an answer or even before we knew about God, we may have asked the universe or something higher than ourselves and reflect on those experiences to see if we did actually receive answers.

‘Can we rely on God to know what is best for us?’ was the next question I asked. If somebody knows what is best for us then they have to have more knowledge and experience (at least in that area) in order to know what it is we need to do or feel for our best outcome. If we think about this with the people around us no one knows entirely what is best for us as every human is undeveloped or developed in some aspects but not others so we can’t rely on anyone to know what is best for us entirely. However, God created everything in the universe and the laws that govern everything. God also knows everything about us and everything about love in order to have created it all to begin with. It would make sense that God is the most reliable when it comes to knowing what’s best for us more than any other person. I found this answer simple but profound when I spent time reflecting on it more.

The next question was ‘can we rely on God to guide us in every situation?’ I feel the answer to this involves having faith in God’s laws working for us, at all times, for our own good and if we start to realise these laws are a part of God we can start to see that God is constantly attempting to guide us (rather than just the law) through our differing situations personally through personal feedback given or shown through the laws to us. If we notice the reliability of the laws we start to notice God is a reliable guide. Another thing that helped me here was experimenting with what God was attempting to show me and through the experiments I started to realise God doesn’t lie and is trustworthy in the feedback. Over time I’ve started to develop a feeling that God is a reliable guide if I trust the feedback given and follow it or go into it, such as what the law of attraction shows me about myself.

The next question I asked was ‘can we rely on God not to judge us?’ Here it has been important to differentiate between accurately assessing someone and negative judgement. When we feel judged we often mean it, or feel it, in the negative sense and that someone has judged us as unworthy or judged us inaccurately. However it is possible to judge someone, weigh and measure them not as a negative action but as a positive action to help assist or aid us and also we can be judged on the good we have done in a positive way which doesn’t feel so bad when we think about that. So I feel it is possible that God does, potentially and accurately, assess us, not to punish, but to know what would be of greatest assistance to us because God loves us and wants us to grow to our best most loving potential. But I don’t feel God judges us negatively or condemns us based on a past action or more importantly I feel God just makes an accurate assessment, if you like, of the truth of ourselves but never withholds love, redemption or feels we are unworthy of love, truth and change.

If we look at it like this we can see that God never judges us in an attacking or dismissive sense and because God values love and truth above all else and wants every one of us to grow in love towards him that making an unloving judgement of us wouldn’t be loving or something God would partake of.

If we look at the current unloving condition of man and our own experiences of feeling a feeling of love, forgiveness and support from a higher source (if we have had one of those experiences)after we have had a pain or a breakdown of sorts we can see that despite our present situations, no matter what they are or how unloving we may have been, that we have felt love or forgiveness at times which shows us that God hasn’t judged us (in the negative sense) but has shown the opposite through feelings of love and forgiveness that God is reliable and never negatively judges us for our injuries or past/present actions and that God cares for and supports us through the healing process and also encourages us to express our true personalities in the most loving ways. God doesn’t judge our true personalities negatively but celebrates them as God created them. So we can see that if God loves that God wouldn’t negatively judge us in any way that diminished our worth or attacked us nor would he withhold love or forgiveness.

The last question was ‘can we rely on God to tell us the truth?’ We can look at everything that God has created to help us here. The universe has been built off loving laws that we can discover and have discovered, some of, and we can see that these laws become fact like the law of gravity. It is a truth. If we look at this over a wider area (spiritual and soul based laws) we can start to see more truths that the universe is constructed from and start to see that the creator loves truth. If we look at other laws such as the law of attraction, pertaining to what our own soul attracts to itself, we can start to see there also that everything we attract to ourselves is the truth of our soul condition both positive and negative and that God, the creator of the law loves showing us the truth of ourselves. If we keep reflecting on this we can start to gain more awareness that God really loves truth and if God really loves truth then God would be a reliable source for truth seeking always.

There is a part of my journey here that I would like to mention and that was the realisation that there is such a thing as absolute truth. This happened over a number of years before I started reflecting on God or attempted to seek God but I feel it is important to note as many of us still enjoy truth being changeable rather than absolute but I’ve found great comfort and joy in moments of this realisation that truth always is a relief even if at first it feels painful. When we eventually accept it we feel relieved, awe inspired and grateful. I haven’t had an experience yet where that hasn’t been the case after any pain has been released about it.

I would briefly like to also mention self-reliance. I feel this chapter was important for myself and others as many of us take the self-reliance route rather than the God reliance route. It has been something I have struggled to give up but have started to notice the difference of the two states and self-reliance, for myself, has seemed to come down to two emotional causes and they are arrogance and/or doubts (lack of faith) in God and have had to start to work through those to start to open up to God reliance. I hoped this chapter might help others in this position as even intellectually reflecting can help us see that God really is more knowing and loving than ourselves and has a wealth of guidance and support for us if we transition from self to God reliance. The self-reliant state closes us to this and also from developing a relationship with God in general. If we are focussed on working everything out for ourselves we won’t seek God for a relationship in a heartfelt sense. God reliance doesn’t mean we give up our will to God but that instead of using our will to seek love and truth by ourselves we acknowledge and open our hearts to God’s love and truth and use our will to love as God loves and to learn more about God in the process rather than learning just about ourselves in a self-reliant way which feels more limiting.

So I feel God is reliable, at least intellectually, when I reflect on all those doubts I hold and I realise these doubts are just emotions I need to work through in order to cement in my heart that God is reliable as my guide, friend and parent. Even just intellectually reflecting on this has been very helpful to opening myself up more to God.








Unconditional Love


Most of us have a feeling that parents are one of the closest things we have to unconditional love or that they should reflect that. In reality we know this is not always true. But the idea of being loved unconditionally is something we probably would all resonate with as something we would like for ourselves. Some of us believe there is no such thing and recognise that nobody is perfect. But if we all have freewill to be loving or unloving then in theory it is logical that it is possible to become unconditionally loving. We could get to a point where we could love 24/7. Despite the fact most of us or all of us haven’t felt love from our parents 24/7 we still attribute it as a quality we’d like in a parent or maybe would like to aspire to as a parent.

Due to the fact that every person on the Earth at present has injuries and is unloving to different extents it is highly unlikely at present we will be loved unconditionally by anyone. However we could see that God doesn’t have any injuries and loves us all the time and so there is someone who we could open up to, to receive this love from. We could see that God is an unconditionally loving parent to ourselves more so than our Earthly parents or any other person.

I have found this important to reflect upon for myself due to my own avoidance of seeking love from God and rather I would seek it from family or friends but I think many more do this and avoid God, seeking love from our parents or others, who can’t always love us, and fail to realise that God can and does always love us and is there when we open our hearts to him, waiting for a relationship to start between us. It seems odd to me when I reflect on this that an unconditionally loving being is there waiting yet I seek love from places where love can’t always be given. The most loving being is right there yet I haven’t seen it or realised how much better my life might grow if I open up to the unconditional love of God, my true parent and guide. We seem to want those that don’t love us to love us rather than accept we are already loved by God. When I intellectually looked at this I felt I had been blind to this truth and that I had avoided it, but many of us have issues with letting go of our old relationships and moving forward with God and have issues to resolve before this truth settles in our hearts that God is right there and chooses to love us unconditionally. But we can see that it would make sense to go there.
























Is God our parent? I feel we can look at many qualities we feel parents have or could have and see if God reflects the same to us and when we do that we actually discover God is potentially the most loving parent we could ever have. God personally can communicate with us through God’s laws and through feelings and love. God is nurturing us always physically, spiritually and emotionally. God is reliable, honest and trustworthy. God wants the best for us and that God loves us all unconditionally… an ideal parent, guide and friend.

If we can start to see this and see God as a good parent to ourselves more personally we can start to build the desire to open up this relationship and transformative journey towards discovering God’s love and truth with God as our guide, teacher, comforter, supporter, friend and parent. Have found reflecting on God the parent very helpful in building this desire to open up this relationship with God and to realise more that this personal connection is possible, plausible, logical and potentially a good thing to do for myself.



















Is God Good?






















Freewill Vs God’s



This has been an area I have struggled with personally. There is a tendency for many of us to experience bad events and feel these events are put upon us from an external source rather than us seeing potentially that we are creating those events and are a part of there creation personally. We may even do this after we become aware of God’s laws, for example, like the law of attraction. So even though we may know God’s design and laws are working and exposing something to us we can still feel that what is happening is bad or against us in some way. We may feel God is punishing us if it is a negative attraction event. We may feel God is against us rather than for us. These feelings can come from a number of injuries we hold about God or about our parents and childhood interactions with others. All these injuries where we feel God is bad or, if we are yet to believe in God, when we feel the world is bad, all stop us seeing the good at work in God’s design and God himself. If we don’t start to see the good in a relationship with God and God’s laws we won’t have much to inspire us to move forwards emotionally. We need to acknowledge and work through any emotional injuries about God and any issues pertaining to will, faith, love, truth and humility in order to open us up fully to God’s love and a relationship with God as developing these qualities opens our hearts emotionally into a place of surrender to God and God’s love. I’m personally about to embark on that part of my journey so I can’t yet write any more on that subject, however I have realised it is possible to see some intellectual logic that God could be good which can then open up a desire within our hearts to start to want to work through those emotional issues(to do with will, faith, love, truth and humility and why we are emotionally closed to those things rather than open). An area I have found useful to reflect on is my freewill and reflecting on its design or more the potential that God’s design of the freewill is good.

Our freewill is a part of God’s design that includes such qualities as our free desires, intentions and actions. We have the freedom to choose how we respond or react to events outside of ourselves and the freedom to choose what we personally create for ourselves and for others. All of those qualities point to self-responsibility and can be good or bad because we have the freedom to choose within ourselves what we will do with what we are given.

Every person also has freewill and so they also can choose what they desire, what their intentions are and how they will act in their day to day lives. When there are billions of free wills on the planet and billions of us choose to act unlovingly then there will be negative events around us because we may be a part of them and attract it to ourselves but even then, I started to realise, we could have negative around us even if we are not a part of the negative events ourselves. I have found this important to realise because I have used this as a justification in my own life to tell myself that God is bad, if a negative event happens on the planet, even if I feel I have healed my part in that event, I have seen God as bad for allowing negative events to occur. One example comes to mind here to assist in an explanation. For instance I made the choice to be meat and dairy free in my diet and felt after some remorse that I was no longer a part of the meat and dairy consumption that I could see was causing a lot of damage to the planet and causing suffering to the animals that are a part of it, however, me stopping didn’t stop the event from continuing. Even though I may choose to use my will more lovingly in an area if others choose to continue then the event continues. I felt initially disappointed that my loving action didn’t have much of an impact on the meat and dairy industry and that it was continuing around me still and I felt upset for a time with God that even when I make loving changes that the events can still continue around me. It felt hard initially to accept others free will’s as well as my own and that negative events can happen around me or even to me even if I am no longer a part of that anymore. I could see it wasn’t God creating the negative events but the feeling I had was that I felt God’s law of allowing freewill was bad. But when I dissected this further I felt more specifically that our ability to be unloving was a bad design from God because it felt unfair. I could potentially be a good person in the future yet still be effected by others free will’s to be unloving. I had to start to understand why freewill is loving which includes the potential to be negative as well as positive with our use of it. I used others and my owns ability to use our will’s in an unloving direction to justify to myself that God is bad rather than good and it was only when I started to see that every event around us that is negative is coming from us, the population and our own use of our will that I could start to separate God’s goodness from our self-created badness, if you like. I’ve had to look at why God’s design of allowing us freewill is good. I looked at myself and when I personally make a choice whether it is good or bad and how the action of choosing emotionally connects me to my will and self-responsibility and I can feel the choice I made in my heart. So if I made the wrong choice I can feel the effects of that (if I connect emotionally to the choice, with humility)which may then motivate me to make another choice and when I do make another choice, hopefully a better one, I feel it in my heart, it becomes cemented and a lesson is learnt at the core of my being. I learn to independently act in a more loving way without being told what to do or someone else making the decision for me. We become self-responsible and learn our own strengths. So I feel God allows us to make mistakes and allows us to freely learn from them knowing that that is what will eventually lead us to love in the most profound and powerful way whilst cementing it in our hearts. I find this hard to explain but I’m starting to feel there is something solid learnt by having a freewill choice in everything. For example, when we don’t have to love but choose to love and how powerful that feels in a positive sense somehow. I feel there is much to learn about freewill and that I have barely touched upon it but I find it hard to put this feeling into words at present.

I then felt about if God just put positive in us and didn’t create the freewill choice to go in all or any direction, just one, then we wouldn’t learn, we wouldn’t be free thinking, creative and feeling beings and we would be automatons to God. We wouldn’t learn self-responsibility and the power of choice. If we see the results of our creations good or bad we can learn from the consequences and we learn in a deep and meaningful sense what we did that was right or wrong, loving or unloving. Am starting to feel that freewill and God’s design there must be a good design in that it shows us the power of our souls and what the effects of our choices are and is potentially the best learning experience for us to grow in love and to become more and more responsibly loving beings.

I wrote this chapter because I feel many of us believe God can’t be good due to the negative events we attract to ourselves and the negative events on the Earth without us separating our freewill choices and the effects of those choices in our lives and on the planet and seeing the good in God’s design of the freewill and the love in the design to encourage and guide us to make better more loving choices personally by allowing us to learn from the consequences of such choices and the power our souls have when we make a choice in a loving or unloving direction. I have had to start to see the good in the design of our freewill to see that the creator of that design is also good.

When I see negative events on the planet I don’t blame God or see God as bad anymore but I get a greater sense that I need to understand my own will more and to start to take responsibility for it and that my will is a gift and capable of good and can make choices and act independently of God or others and that I can choose to act in harmony or out of harmony with love. I am still learning about the will but just by starting to understand that or building the desire to want to understand that has helped me to see more of God’s goodness in allowing me and others free reign of our wills and that the bad events around us or towards us are our will’s in action not God’s. This has helped me open up more desire for God now I can start to see the bad events are not from God.












God’s Laws


Taking the last chapter further, we can look at natural laws like the law of gravity, photosynthesis etc. and study them and see the good in the design. We can also do this with higher laws such as the law of attraction, compensation, cause and effect, freewill, repentance etc. and intellectually reflect on potentially why these laws are good. If God created these laws then God must have goodness and be worth connecting with and opening up to. So we can intellectually reflect on these laws but we can also study and experiment with these laws to get some experience to back up our theories and give us more faith in the laws working and have some personal experiences to analyse to see if these experiences were ultimately good and expressed a goodness from God. I feel the experiential route is always the most profound. Intellectually reflecting can also aid us in gaining awareness of the goodness of God and the laws and systems around us, but when we gain an experience it can help us much more rapidly with understanding and analysing these kind of questions. What I have found is often through the experience the truth is often learnt emotionally or we are taken closer to feeling the truth without needing the intellect so heavily. This is where I feel I have come to in my own journey. I can spend hours thinking about all these things without seeking experiences which I feel would ultimately get me to more truth quicker. I feel now, for myself, that I can intellectually reason about us being the pinnacle of God’s creation, that God is our parent and God and God’s laws are good or I can see at least the potential of that, that what is left to do is to now experience those things with a feeling of some interest and curiosity and excitement developing to get to know this good God and what I am capable of receiving, giving and creating when I grow in love. I can start to see it should, in theory at least, be a good direction to explore further.

Reflecting on God’s laws in general and looking at the potential of the goodness of them has helped me open to a stronger feeling that God is good and if God is good then God is worth knowing more about and going towards. A seed is planted on the discovery of a good God that sparks a questioning desire to start to explore this God further.

God’s Abundance


Another area that has assisted me in coming to see God’s goodness is the abundance around us. This can be hard for some of us to notice if we experience a feeling of lack inside ourselves, but it has been a good exercise for myself even though I feel much lack inside still and was and still is challenging to look at as it can confront painful feelings within us. But I feel it has been beneficial in not just seeing God’s potential goodness but starting to develop a feeling of gratitude for the good I see around me and coming towards me.

First I reflected on my life and on good events that have happened no matter how small or where they came from. I also looked at the good events around other people. I looked at the abundance received by myself and others. I started with simple things and materialistic in nature such as I noticed I always had food to eat and so did most others around me, clothes to wear and even if those things weren’t exactly as I had envisioned I was warm, clothed and fed. It may sound simple to some but it was something I have personally taken for granted or not noticed and coming from a society that is normal to have these things I can see that many of us no longer notice the abundance in such simple amenities. I started to also notice that people attracted abundance in different areas. Some people had an abundance of shoes and others an abundance of cars and others an abundance of fabric scraps and buttons and others an abundance of money. Although these were materialistic I could start to see that God allows us our own desires and for abundance in those desires. I then started to notice people who didn’t value materialistic things but had an abundance of kind friends or lived in a small run down house with an abundance of nature around them. These feelings of lack within myself, I started to realise, aren’t lack but an abundance of what I really desire. For example, if I desired to be alone I would have an abundance of alone time but first I had to admit I wanted to be alone, even though I thought I didn’t, in order to see it. So I started to realise what my soul truly desires I not only get but I get in abundance. I found this important to understand because I couldn’t see God as always abundant but only sometimes (with positive events) but when I looked at my negative desires I could see that I get abundance all the time and if that is the case then abundance is consistent and potentially another of God’s laws.

We can also see abundance in nature. From one seed a fruit can grow and within that fruit there are tens to hundreds of seeds that can grow hundreds more fruits. One mammal can birth many lives. One tree can grow thousands of leaves. One rain storm can quench the thirst of millions of lives. One planet can host millions of life forms and sustain them with more to spare. If we look at nature we can see abundance is everywhere. Then I noticed a bit more about abundance and I had an experience where I desired a walnut and I had no way of getting one but just fancied one or desired it. Later the next day I was gifted a shopping bag of walnuts, straight from a tree, and I laughed and felt God was having a joke with me saying ‘You wanted one walnut so I gave you 50.’ It was a funny experience but showed me that abundance is part of God’s nature and is good. I had so many walnuts that I felt I wanted to share them with others and became a part of abundance for another. It was really a beautiful lesson about the gift of abundance. It also has confronted many issues about myself, some selfish desires to not give and fear in giving and some low worth in not deserving such abundance and being overwhelmed by it which I’m still working through. But it highlighted to me that abundance is ever present, is good and is a part of God’s nature which I can also be a part of.

I have found reflecting on abundance and revisiting my experiences there, have assisted me to see and feel more of God’s goodness.




What reflecting on God’s goodness has done is enable me to start to have a small desire or longing to know God or start to get to know God. Even just to see the potential of it has made me more curious intellectually but what has happened more profoundly is that after reflecting on God’s goodness is a small feeling desire in my heart, rather than my mind, to want to know God more, not just the concept of God but to know and experience the goodness of God and what that is like. A feeling desire has developed, although small, to take a step further and open my heart a little to receive God’s potential love and a seeking feeling is appearing from the realisation that God logically must be good and I want to find out and experience it, more than I did at the start of this book.

Also a new feeling that I can send love to God has started to develop by looking at the goodness around me in the laws and the goodness in abundance. I have started to send a small feeling of gratitude and love, in places, to the designer…to God. I realise now that the opening to God is two ways and that I must have a desire for the relationship and to feel some love to God in order to open my soul to receive love from God. That the reception and gifting of love is more interconnected than I previously thought.

Reflecting on God’s goodness has really assisted me in making an opening for this communication and exchange of feelings from myself to God and from God to myself.





When I started writing this book I wasn’t sure if I would feel closer to starting or opening up to a relationship with God or whether I would find much to write about. The book in itself has been an experiment and has taken me approx. six months to write as I tried to feel if I could any emotions that came up on the journey as I confronted myself with the subjects I wanted to write about. By doing this I have realised my desire to blame others for my misfortunes and to avoid taking responsibility for my emotions and will has been skewing my view of God being good. Certain emotions and beliefs within me have had to be challenged in order to write this book, such as the desire to be intellectually knowing, arrogance, blame of others for personal emotional pain, the desire to defend pain and many more aspects has all had to be exposed for me to discover good things about God more deeply or heartfelt.

I hoped with this book I could help others who are in a doubting or unsure place as to whether or not they wish to take this journey with God further, as well as myself, and to help us really look at the potential, despite our pain still that we may hold, that this relationship with God is good and to desire to open it up and to step into it.

I hope it has inspired you to look at the exciting possibilities of a loving God and that God potentially wants to teach us all God knows about love, truth and joy and that our pain is created by ourselves and others, not God, and that it is just a necessary stage to release our held in pain about past events in order to clear a channel for God’s love to flow into us with a desire from us to receive this love.

I can start to see and feel that a longing for God, even though it is still small within myself, is possible now and that this longing for God’s goodness and love is what opens us to a two-way relationship with God. The more I have a sense of gratitude and love for God or towards aspects of God and God’s nature the more I desire to open up to receive love from God.

I feel the next step for myself now is continuing to release these blocks mentioned in the book but also starting to resolve my issues with allowing myself to feel emotion all the time and resolving the issues I have around will, faith, love, truth and humility which are now starting to be exposed to myself and will most likely inspire the next book as I learn more about those qualities and gain more experience there.

I hope you found this book at the right time for your own journey and that it helped you build more of a desire to open to God with your heart or the potential of this relationship intellectually.

I wish you all well on your journeys.

















Extra Notes


The cover of this book is a pencil drawing I did last year of an open helping hand. I see the drawing as either Gods hand or the hand of my brothers and sisters and reminds me to open up to loving assistance or to be the loving assistance to another.


I have been greatly inspired by the teachings of Jesus and Mary and I recommend visiting divinetruth.com for more information on higher laws, God and the soul.


Some experiments I did along the journey that may help others(or questions I asked and investigated)…

p<>{color:#000;}. ‘What is divine and unique about the human being?’ Wrote list.

p<>{color:#000;}. Listened to choirs, to help reconnect to past experiences and allowed myself to feel the loving potential of God and the human through the experience.

p<>{color:#000;}. Wrote down all the laws I knew of scientifically and researched them and the same for spiritual and soul based laws (higher laws) such as, the law of attraction, and reflected on why they are good laws. ‘How do they personally benefit me and others?’

p<>{color:#000;}. Wrote a list of what I felt a good parent would be and ‘can God reflect this?’ by looking at own experiences, others experiences and the laws again.

p<>{color:#000;}. Spent a week looking at my abundance, personally, and noticing what I had an abundance of (both positive and negative).

p<>{color:#000;}. Wrote a list of all good things I felt had happened to me and acknowledged God being involved in those things which helped develop some gratitude towards God.

p<>{color:#000;}. Wrote down a list of my reactions to what I was going to write and identified through it some personal issues such as arrogance, ego, blame etc. which helped me start to resolve those blocks to opening up to more truth about God. So perhaps writing down your reactions whilst reading this book could do similar for you and help you with those issues that close us off to looking further into a relationship with God.



































Shall I Open To God?

  • Author: Laura Berry
  • Published: 2017-01-26 01:50:09
  • Words: 15352
Shall I Open To God? Shall I Open To God?