Jokes about girls
Copyright William Gore 2016
Published at Shakespir
Table of contents.
Jokes about girls
The guy brings the girl home to meet parents. It, coming into a hall, suddenly loudly breaks wind and is confused:
— What chandelier at you beautiful.
— Into the hall you will come — in general you will be trashed!
Listen, it is necessary to occupy to the girl 30 thousand the guy. What reason for it to think up?
— On abortion…
— It costs 3 thousand!
— Tell, that there is a lot of you…
— Darling, who these girls?
— You told that are necessary to you for summer of the Vietnamese.
The girl — the blonde calls the guy:
— My computer doesn’t work.
— And pressed so big button?
— And the cord in the socket is thrust?
— Now I will take a small lamp, I will look…
— And small lamp, what for?
— Yes light was gone.
On Saturday met friends.
One told as with the wife went to restaurant a week ago: “… specially trained girl goes on the hall and with genuine pleasure asks all visitors, whether they solved already where to them to celebrate New Year, well and, actually, invites to note in their restaurant. Approaches us and asks with a smile as the Cheshire cat:
— And you already solved where you will note NG?
— Yes, on the Canary Islands, Tenerife Puerto de la Cruz
Further the Mkhat pause, the girl right there changes in the person and is very plaintive:
— “Take me with yourself”.
The girl pensively speaks to the guy:
— And so sometimes there is a wish to feel weak and defenseless…
— Well … Burn the passport.
The guy with the girl came to cinema, mudflows to the last row. The guy speaks:
— Well, the darling, half an hour already we sit, and you didn’t even kiss me.
— So I just sucked off to you!
— To me?!
Young comes into shop both the girl is beautiful and asks the elderly seller:
— How much for this fabric?
— Cheap. One meter — one kiss.
— Yes, it is really cheap. I will take 10 meters. Here my address, the grandmother will pay.
The guy tries to get acquainted with the girl:
— Hi, we will get acquainted?
— You who?
— Probably, the one whom you waited for all life!
— Father Frost, it you?
The guy with the girl walk in the evening:
— I am cold, give a jacket.
— No, you to me already stretched one.
One guy liked the girl. He approached it and made an avowal of sentiments. That in reply:
— You have 3 Mercedes?
— And two floor country house?
— Then the conversation is ended.
He comes to the father and asks for suggestions. The father speaks:
what can I say. Bentley of course can sell and buy 3 Mercedes, but to demolish three floors because of the woman… The sonny it isn’t serious.
Such tightened, advanced in years, well dressed man and the stunning young person, with a languishing look go by one train of a coupe. He reads the newspaper, she pretends that she reads the book, continually postrelivy on it eyes. After a while between them there is the following dialogue:
— The young man, and I to you am absolutely uninteresting?
— Why — that answers — you a simply charm.
— But then why you undertake nothing, it is so fascinating, to win, entertain the woman, to tempt her, you for certain are able to do it in perfection, and perhaps then you will get the first prize.
— And sense? — the man asked — here for example, say, you love fresh croissants in the mornings?
— Oh yes they such crackling.
— And you like to knead dough?
— Well you, it is simpler to me to go and buy them in a bakery — being perplexed the young lady answered.
— Here and I am a person not poor — he smiled to it.
The guy speaks to the girl — the blonde:
— Marry me!
— And that there… for you?
— Girl, and how old are you?
— And you know that to ask the woman about her age impolitely?
— And to sit down at seduction juvenile, in your opinion, politely will be?
The girl on the street, stammering, asks the guy:
— With — with — tell, сс — сс — how many, времмм — mm — мя?
He is silent. She asked once again — zero reaction. She took offense and left.
The woman standing nearby:
— Why you didn’t answer? You have hours on a hand!
— That on — on — to receive on mm — m — a muzzle?!
The maniac runs in the bus and shouts:
— Now I will rape all!
— Well though elderly don’t touch.
— Told all, means all!
The guy approaches the girl and tries to get acquainted:
— The girl, and it is possible to invite you at cinema?
— And than Maldives aren’t pleasant to you?
— It is necessary to treat the girl accurately, as with a fir-tree.
— To cut down and carry away home?
Are sure, tricks about girls will be interesting to very much. Interesting selection of a photo of tricks. a selection where you will find in each photo that that ridiculous! Girls like guys with good sense of humour. But they very much don't love when they become a subject of jokes and tricks.