How to Live With Bipolar Disorder
By Brittany Tallon
This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Shakespir.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
I write for my husband and family. I am the person I am today because of them.
This book is for those who live with bipolar disorder, but still do not know how to cope. You love your parents, but treat them badly. You want to give your child the best life you can, but do not understand bipolar disorder. You need your bipolar spouse to be there for you. Your family is ripping apart because of the illness, and you are powerless to stop it. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. It comes if you work hard and keep fighting.
Here are six things you should do:
Take your medicine. It is the most important out of all the things you can do. You will regret not taking it. Take your medicine, and you will not feel manic or depressed.
Try to live an orderly and stress free life, and when you cannot, then ask for help. It does not matter where the help comes from. It could be a family member, friend, or a professional. There is always someone to turn to.
Be nice to those who love you, even when it is hard. Say you are sorry, even when you do not want to. If you do not think it will help, then say it, anyway. You would be surprised how a gesture of love and forgiveness can make you feel better. I did not say I am sorry for the longest time. I held a grudge against my parents, my brother, and the world. Forgive, because when you do not, it eats at your insides. Do you want to live your life hating everyone and everything? I think not.
Find your purpose. It is most likely right underneath you. It will give you something to live for. I have always liked to read and write, but I avoided all hobbies, because I was depressed. Now I use writing as a tool for my soul, which brings me to my next point.
Write down your feelings, your desires, and even your rage. It will help your soul, and bring out the best in you. Do not let it fester.
Appreciate your parents, because they lived to love you. For those who do not have parents, or have parents that do not care, then appreciate those friends who are like family. If you do not have friends, then appreciate those small kind gestures from strangers. If you feel like you have none of the above, I challenge you to find a church or a hobby that makes socializing easier. I had social anxiety for years, and I know it is not easy to come out of your house, or even your bedroom. All I am asking for is that you try.
As you can see, most of these are about love and forgiveness. Do not hold onto the bad in your life, but embrace those things that make you happy. Give life to what makes you feel complete.
Here are six things you should not do:
Do not hold in your feelings. Talk to the people who care. If you have OCD, then write down your feelings or thoughts. I was constantly making lists, so I could have it on paper, but not in my head.
Do not hurt those you love. When you say or do hurtful things, then you are damaging a relationship. Do your best to hold onto your temper. Find something else to do that you really enjoy. If you have to, hit a pillow.
Count to ten, and do not let your emotions control you. You are not your emotions. You are strong, capable, and good. Your mind may tell you that you are not, but remember that your thoughts do not own you. I still get that devil in my head, and I still see terrible things when I close my eyes. If you breathe and calm yourself, it will not have a hold over you. This is not easy; however, it is easy to say.
Do not play the victim. As I said, you are strong and capable. Conquer your fears, and find your inner strength. It is there, I promise you. The hardships you deal with on a daily basis will prepare you for the worst in life. Step out into the world, and show people who you REALLY are.
Do not think other people can make you happy. They cannot, and they never will. People are going to disappoint you, but that does not mean they do not love you.
Do not think you are alone in your suffering. Find a support group or someone who is going through it. I do not want you to feel alone. Your life is worth living, and you deserve more. It is not for family and friends that you get better, but for you. It will lead you to great places and better times ahead.
All the tips given on what not to do are difficult things for someone with bipolar. The things I mentioned TO DO are hard, as well. You have to find some peace of mind. For those who do not want it, they will never find it. For those that do, you will forge ahead.
Next, I come to parents who worry. It can rip a family apart when you see your child or teenager in pain. IT IS pain, but of the mind.
Here are five things parents need to know:
Listen to your child. Not all are lying and raging on about their latest drama. They need your help, and they want you to hear them.
Do not think you know their feelings, because you do not. They are an individual, and they have the right to be who they are. Do not tell them who they are.
Do not try to change them. I know you want them to be better, but this is who they are. I do not mean that you should not take care of them. Always take them to a physician, but do not try to change THEM. The illness does not go away completely, even with medicine. They change once they hear the physician give a diagnosis.
Do not keep on them constantly, especially when they are angry. Try to give them space. They need it, especially for those with social anxiety. Do not give up, either. Try to engage them in conversation and activities. Be there for them, but do not make them do more than they can handle.
You do need to watch them for signs of suicidal behavior. When their actions and voice cry out for help, do not push that aside as bipolar disorder. It is not just bipolar disorder. Do not think that they are lying to you, either. It is suicidal thoughts, and it will lead to suicidal behavior. You need to be prepared at all times. Keep the knives, pills, and cleaning supplies locked up if you have to. If they are suicidal, then they will find a way, despite that.
Do not make them feel ashamed. They are bipolar, and we have already established that it will not change. Do not make them feel like they have done something wrong. Do not make them think they need to hide it for reasons of your own. Let them be themselves, and it will keep a smile on their face.
There are spouses who deal with their fair share of problems. He or she needs to be strong for their bipolar spouse, and this can be difficult at times.
Here are three tips for the spouse of a bipolar person:
Take care of yourself before you take care of someone else. Do not ignore your spouse, but find time to rest. You should also have your own hobbies, so you can get away at times.
You need to be there for them when they are manic or depressed. They turn to you to make the decisions. You need to know that they are not in a safe place. You also need to know the signs of manic and depressive stages.
Get them help when you see they are unstable. Ask them to go to counseling or to a doctor. Whatever type of help they need. It is your job to see they get it. This is a real illness, so treat it that way.
I hope your family can come together again. I hope if you are a bipolar individual, then you find peace and a purpose. I hope that the spouse can find a way to accept the position they are in. If you try, then everything will fall into place. Remember, you are stronger than you know.
This advice is for your benefit, but I am not a physician. I tell you only because I go through it, as well. Parents, I have been in that child’s place. Spouses, I watch what my husband goes through. You do what seems best at the time, and at least you tried. I know my loved ones try every day. They do not always do the right thing, but I forgive them. Your child knows when they are loved and cared for. Your spouse, however, will not always know. It takes work to keep a marriage together. Your bipolar spouse may not be able to work at it. These are just helpful tips to get you back to a stable foundation.
I am not a physician, so please always refer to your doctor.
I am a 27-year-old wife and mother. Medical Office Assistant is my day job, but I dream of doing more.
I have struggled with Bipolar Disorder for most of my life. It can be a struggle for those who have it and for those who have to watch their loved one go through it. I wrote this for the teenager going through it, the parent who has to watch helplessly, and for the spouse who may not understand completely. This is a short guide that I wish I had when I was going through the worst of times. Maybe it can help families not have to go through the same turmoil as my own.