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The Darndest Dictionary

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The Darndest

Dictionary

 

By Mark Namsick

 

 

Published in Comic Sans to be more readable

if dyslexic. Everyone else is on their own.

 

ISBN: 978-0-692-88516-1

© 2017 Mark Namsick All Rights Reserved.

Cover Photo by Alice Achterhof

 

 

Preface

 

“The beginning of wisdom is

the definition of terms.”

- Socrates

 

According to Socrates, saying a word without understanding its meaning succeeds only in making meaningless noise. This idea had a strong impact on my early years. To see that some concepts like love or beauty could take a lifetime to partially define was humbling.

I soon realized that looking up “meaning” in the dictionary was not the shortcut to living a meaningful life, and looking up “morality” was not useful for being moral. This made me wonder often about the meaning of words, all the while adding to my own list of definitions. A love of music provided a sense of rhyme, interplay, poetic qualities and connotation.

Eventually I realized there was much more to words than could ever be put together in a “real” dictionary, and that writing one would be futile to attempt.

This is that that attempt.

And it rhymes.

 

 

Accident

 

Happenstance of quantum things

or pluck of luck to puppet strings.

 

Accompaniment

 

A you to be beside a me

to be a we in harmony.

 

Advertisement

 

An overpass of comprehension

built to span a short attention.

 

Anger

 

The trying sound of pain

as it tries to leave the brain.

What’s expelled must then be felt,

so often we retain.

 

Ambition

 

A commodity kept in stock in every store:

more and more, and more and more.

 

Apathy

 

Were I to wear a warning

the sign would simply say:

I had three fucks this morning

but I gave them all away.

 

Appear

 

To vanish in reverse;

a line of sight traverse.

 

Aspire

 

To throw a grapple of the mind

to where you want to start to climb.

 

Archaeologist

 

He who pines to smell a fine perfume

once upon a time he might exhume.

 

Autodidact

 

A self-made man who taught himself -

no help but those who loaded screen and shelf.

 

Animals

 

All of us a cousin of em’.

 

Autopsy

 

To peel and part my parts in part to see

if perhaps a person murdered me.

 

Average Joe

 

The median man, often not

a go-getter that ever greatly got.

 

Battlefield

 

What politicians put upon

a soldier left to soldier on.

 

Beauty

 

The whole surpassing sum of parts,

as separate strokes mingle

to a single

piece

of

art.

 

Bias

 

Wind which blows your mind ashore.

Every ship resigned to drift

finds itself a derelict, no more.

 

Bicycle

 

A pulley made to push.

A brake that’s meant to rush.

Oh to go for half an hour

by pedal, gear and flour power.

 

Birth

 

Mature or pre evacuation,

post mature or pre ejaculation.

 

Blanket

 

A curtain of cotton

blown by winds

of worlds forgotten.

 

Blasphemy

 

To go against the holy bible

in spirit, for in print it’s libel.

 

Blouse

 

A top to stop the light revealing

what we’re taught demands concealing.

Covers not the face but shames the breast;

the accepted burka of the west.

 

Border

 

The boundary those within

are all-in and bout about.

 

Book Bag

 

A bag of nooks to bag your books today

which Kindle wants to whisk away.

 

Break Up

 

Pry apart the part attained

to start a broken heart again.

 

Bridge

 

Stepping stone beyond compare:

a short-cut cut through open air.

 

Bull

 

A beast which feasts as we await

the shit that’s his to delegate.

 

Bus

 

Fraternity which daily changes,

membership and destinations.

 

Caffeine

 

More imbibed when less alert

so think not hurt.

 

Caller I.D.

 

Unwanted callers christened;

a catalyst for cell division.

 

Calorie

 

A bit of your mizzle, before it’s the shizzle.

 

Cannibals

 

Contrarians elite

that eat the meat

of vegetarians.

 

Cannonball

 

As the earth, a metal ball.

Once spring has sprung then all is fall.

 

Car

 

Creationists insist

it’s a contrivance that drives us.

 

Carbon

 

Weightless while exhausting and it seems

to warm the world to smithereens.

 

Catholics

 

Beatles fans who coo and fawn

under Paul, and over John.

 

Ceiling

 

A blockade made for warming,

or glass barrier alarming

when used for keeping people down,

not miniature farming.

 

Cemetery

 

Fickle fates our futures jot,

putting pits in lots of plots.

 

Censors

 

Men of class few words get past

who’d never mention gas

except in passing.

 

Chain

 

A bit of clink to link a given length of links to things.

 

Chair

 

This stand can stand to bear your end

‘til you can bear to stand again.

 

Charity

 

What some got,

and won’t, but ought.

 

Chicken

 

A bitty bird we’ve often bit to bones;

purposeful when crossing roads.

 

Choice

 

To publicly contrive who lives and dies

or hang the hidden hangers up to dry.

 

Church

 

Where many people share one heart,

hand in hand, and set apart.

 

Circle

 

Any path which deviates a little

finds beginning after middle.

 

Clairvoyant

 

One who sees enough to meddle

only once the dust is settled.

 

Clock

 

An eye to watch the sun go by

despite a door or darkened sky.

 

 

Concrete

 

Fact of which there is no contestation,

set in stone by mixture with precipitation.

 

Conjugal

 

The modern con has visitation

to beat the rap and grant probation.

 

Constantine

 

Bestowed upon a billion people

a wild throne and broken steeple.

 

Consummation

 

Well-earned success is better than sex,

though non-validation beats masturbation.

 

Comedy

 

A beautiful fool stumbles into

happiness and fortune glue.

 

 

Computer

 

A billion bits of somethings

switching microscopic lights

which brighten screens,

show what more ones and zeroes

than we’ve ever seen,

are supposed to really mean.

 

Constellation

 

Distant dots which push and pull,

empty out, and swallow whole.

 

Corporation

 

A little cell holding little people’s lives,

endlessly metastasized.

 

Cow

 

A beast of burden brown of eyes,

atop a plate, aside of fries.

 

Crime

 

Sin apparent to a vast majority

or good fun spoiled by someone in authority.

That which you may not,

but some do and get caught,

though often a minority.

 

Cruelty

 

Suffering contagious

to turn inside outrageous.

 

Crumb

 

As ice is to berg so crumb is to bread;

a burgerberg ahoy ahead.

 

Cry

 

To look inside for all to see,

and brave the private publicly.

 

Cunnilingus

 

Lend your man a hand and do not frown,

for who comes up must then go down.

 

Cunning

 

Undertaking aftermath

and cognizant of consequence.

 

Cup

 

A lip to keep a dozen sips of stuff

from dripping down and messing up.

 

Cupid

 

Pierces hearty arteries,

hardened as Achilles was to archery.

 

Current

 

Magnets spun can make electrons be

powerfully slippery.

 

Dagger

 

A long-abused and short antique

once sprung a trap to spring a leak.

 

Dancing

 

Merely granting one or more

a more than ordinary measure

of your full attention.

 

Darkness

 

A Luddite putting up a fight,

‘gainst the yawning of the night.

 

Death

 

Your father’s father is father fodder,

the stuff of stuff we self-explore;

the you that was before you were

forever is, and are no more.

 

Democracy

 

A brain contains a kingdom,

and every king decrees

sentiment or logic

and little in-between.

I bid you bid that despot part

with power over mind or heart

so great debates and passions sway

to bring tomorrow to today.

 

Diamond

 

Soot that wasn’t satisfied

‘til time and tension rarefied.

 

Disagreement

 

Won by point of fact or tip of sword;

censorship, or better written word.

 

Discretion

 

To hush and shush and trip a trap

which desperately wants to yap.

 

Download

 

Duplicate a little bit;

a copy of a counterfeit.

 

Drama

 

Stress and mess to clean and dress

each cut and scrape this life begets.

 

Drug

 

A lever sending pain and pleasure

out of order just in order to

be short reformer of the former;

underground if overdo.

 

Dualism

 

A major meme that always seems

to mean a couple different things.

 

Dust

 

Just a crust, but one we cling to oft,

as rust we must be once we shuffle off.

 

Ear

 

A keyhole through which things are rampant,

which to eyes are not apparent,

making sense of those events which hid

from groping hand and gaping lid.

 

Edit

 

Take a bit of wood and nail,

add a rudder, mast and sail.

 

Ejaculate

 

To vent frustrations;

the ramifications

of tense relations.

 

Ellipse

 

Three periods to start a pause,

grammatical menarche à trios.

 

Emotion

 

Big pictures of quantum chances;

quarks react, and fire dances.

 

Entendre

 

Intoxicants to blur your view,

dividing vision or cognition into two,

whether extra wine imbibed or thought imbued.

 

Enterprise

 

A project propelled by people who surround it,

though actually it’s space that warps around it.

 

Epitaph

 

A private era none but you has known,

briefly put, and set in stone.

 

Epitome

 

An epiphany to see

I’m the epitome of me.

All that else can ever be

is just a it of you and we.

 

Equation

 

An abstract construction

with numbers for lumber.

 

Esophagus

 

A soup of sort-of former food

squeezes down this tooth-paste tube.

 

Euphemism

 

Superfluous syllables spoke to misdirect

from that which might yourself reflect.

 

Evangelist

 

A viral file thought it might

folder label over-write.

 

Explosion

 

Phenomenon emergent,

both uniform and urgent.

 

Fart

 

When three are in an elevator

the source of their displeasure

as any carpenter knows well,

but once you cut

and twice you measure.

 

Father

 

A parent apparently,

maybe inherently.

 

Father Time

 

Slow and steady moves the glacier

makin’ time with mother nature.

 

Fear

 

Small cudgel that bludgeons

all noggins it nudges.

 

Fellatio

 

As any penis punished will assert

comeuppance can be just dessert.

 

Fertile

 

Fit to plant a plant to

make another plant to

till and till

until you will

a blue pill need to plan to.

 

Fiction

 

Right to write

what’s not but might,

or won’t but still

your heart excites.

 

Fire

 

Breaking chains which never brake until

every bond has broken, or every link is still.

 

Fission

 

The saddest of all matters is

the loneliness of matter, ‘tis

a fact when atoms come together,

hearts are one, then bonds are severed.

 

Flash

 

A sudden blinding sense of whiteness

as if by something nude and Irish.

 

Flood

 

What God did self-prohibit

lest he loose the holy spigot.

 

Foam

 

An atom’s view far from home,

of its and many other domes.

 

Food

 

Fuel for thought without which we halt,

best ingested with a grain or two of salt.

 

Fog

 

Sometimes the sea grows stormy,

and makes the seaways horny.

 

Forgive

 

To love in light of

and in spite of.

 

Fortune

 

After all he oughtn’t mind

the won and lost, the more aware

that every step which fate assigned

led him to him, and brought you there.

 

Frankenstein

 

Maker of a monstrous dummy.

Feared by all, except his mummy.

 

Friend

 

One whose where’s the same as you

just so there’s the two of you.

 

Fundamentalist

 

On the path of parables he sees

not the moral of the forest,

but the fiction in the trees.

 

Gas Chamber

 

Where one may find the guilt of crime

in of door, and out of time.

 

Gerrymandering

 

Why half the leaders you abhor

are not the droids you voted for.

 

Ginger

 

Red head or brown bread;

each speck a freckle, or raisin fed.

 

Glass

 

A magic crystal which may without conception,

reflect on your and pass on my perception.

 

God

 

Proof of which is hard to show.

He must exist; we cannot know.

 

Government

 

A force for solving all our problems

assuming that it did not cause them.

 

Granted

 

Given, but worth so much more

than we receive when taken for.

 

Graze

 

When fauna feed upon on a floor of flora.

 

Gunshot

 

Small tears in sound barriers

to tear a mother’s little ones away from her.

 

Hair

 

A euphemism for the fur adorning

apes who mourn and scorn their origins.

A rose by any name would smell as sweet,

even springing from the mud beneath your feet.

 

Halloween

Two tons of sweets to feed me

to two types of diabetes.

 

Hate

 

The moment pain or alarm

push to wish or act of harm.

 

Heartbreak

 

Humpty Dumpty waits beyond

a wall called love he’d set upon;

‘til a passerby impart

pieces from an eggshell heart.

 

Home

 

Any other people who

ever feel at home with you.

 

Hospital

 

The only church which once admits,

binds the wound, and then remits.

 

House

 

A giant splinter that remains

until the loan has been regained.

 

Hurricane

 

Wind and hail that hails from far away;

circling the halo of a vast tornado.

 

Hypocrisy

 

A second splinter we acquire

eye to eye, discerning neither.

 

Idealism

 

An isle of hell that lies between

All Is Well, and All We’ve Seen.

Those who’ll only see one shore

condemn us thus forevermore.

 

Idolatry

 

A finger pointed to the sky

at burning sun or cooling rain,

deciding which to petrify,

‘til life is gone and stone remains.

 

Ignorance

 

Not to know is not a sin;

a circle all are born within.

But to believe you are without,

is to pretend without a doubt.

 

Indoctrinate

 

Encourage and anoint

a child to play for points,

perhaps one day to play no more

and find no one was keeping score.

 

Inessential

 

Needlessly abundant,

superfluous, and redundant.

 

Infidel

 

An adulteress arrested

for that which has offended

a patriarch to whom her heart

had never been intended.

 

Inflation

 

Bankers make and break a mint

when gold is green and fit to print.

 

Immortality

 

A gift denied to man and Adam,

while granted to his every atom.

 

Jacket

 

A coat to coat, quote-unquote.

 

Jesus

 

Concurrently enforced and banned;

the most noted and mis-quoted man.

 

Jettison

 

Discard that which you’ve collected,

but no longer want, or have digested.

 

Joseph

 

A foretold cuckold.

 

Jury Duty

 

Waive the right to represent

and give consent to circumvent.

 

Justice

 

Truth will out to those within

ear and shout of reasonable doubt.

 

Kill

 

Take a beautiful machine

and introduce a wrench

to break all it has ever been,

save a motive for revenge.

 

Law

 

Three way split ‘tween he who is I am,

mother earth, and uncle sam.

 

Lefty

 

The sort of sort to turn to port.

 

Lesbian

 

She who knows just where it’s at,

bit for bit, ‘n’ tit for tat.

 

Lexicographer

 

One who until now defined

words in ways which didn’t rhyme.

 

Life

 

A puzzle that muddles heart and eye;

solutions found by all

but those who never try.

 

Light

 

The filmy residue that’s left upon your sight,

after scouring the night.

 

Living

 

A most persistent thorny weed -

clutch it tight and fingers bleed.

Let it go to drop the pain,

and pick up naught but ought again.

 

LOL

 

Reaction when a leg somebody pulls,

though often compensating for the lulls.

 

Love

 

Pain and pleasure I could not define

by the hundredth page of word and rhyme.

 

Lose

 

Back to square one or two

where everything’s the same – but you.

 

Marketing

 

Smiling widely calm and coldly,

right hand reaching in a hat

retrieves a rabbit, now watch closely;

you had this, and I have that.

 

Marriage

 

To pray away the gaiety

and make two people whole

to friend and foe and family

in every blended role.

 

Martyr

 

Hoped and loved and set upon,

dream dispelled and love withdrawn,

slipped the grip of guardian hand,

and left behind to carry on.

 

Mary

 

Live a life of love inerrant,

still end up a teenage parent.

 

Mine

 

Owned, but only rented

once the patent’s pended.

 

Miss

 

Move beyond, continue forward

intending to have traveled toward.

 

Morality

 

Values which objectively

coincide subjectively.

 

Mortal

 

Once upon a didn’t happen

a salesman tempted Eve and Adam;

with serpent’s oil said to cure

the very thing they always were.

 

Motorcycle

 

The seed who speeds and hurries hardest

halves the time to fall and harvest.

 

Movie

 

A thousand million pictures still,

fired rapid fire ‘til

they overtake our real world perception.

Reality and fiction blur

as we prefer

whichever has the best direction.

 

Multiverse

 

Our existence would be lonely

if it was the one and only.

 

Mystery

 

Nature gave us eyes to tease us

just to tempt to search and please us.

 

Narcissism

 

Stretching mirrors;

shards and slivers.

 

Necrophilia

 

A pervert’s private parts interred

in one who was not twice disturbed.

 

Neighborhood

 

Lots of lots of little things

of broken homes and makeshift dreams;

a kingdom where a child king begins

to conquer hope and fear and then

leaves to face the world unknown,

and doesn’t quite return again.

 

News

 

Focus the people’s collective attention

on what few tycoons selectively mention.

 

No

 

Sometimes a Yes whose shrewd disguise

is infiltrated through the eyes.

 

Not

 

Love this life of lovely-nots,

woo the world of never-be,

because for all her many faults

she found a place for you and me.

 

Number

 

A symbol defining a unit,

a quantity, weight or a cubit,

extent or degree,

or the latest draftee

the Yankees had thought would be prudent.

 

Oblivious

 

Cut the lawn and cook the food

for decades, but inquire

not to how the grass renewed,

or what in hell was fire.

 

Omega

 

In ancient Greece, a modern zed

which means a Z to me instead.

 

OMG

 

Rarely spoke in open air.

Like totally the shortest prayer.

 

Open

 

Pried wide, as eye or mind.

I do adore a door to more

than we have time to find.

 

Order

 

The sequence of events you’re told

you must commence lest someone scold.

 

Ours

 

Held as hands, or take in turn;

investment of the best return.

 

Oxygen

 

Fuel which if not constantly consumed,

a candle flickers, and darkness looms.

 

Paint

 

A theory of conspiracy does bid

a whistle to blow open wide the lid,

of a cover up that covers,

something hidden from us, nebulous -

but spruced up something’s prob’ly all it did.

 

Particle

 

The stuff the stuff is made up of.

 

Passion

 

Thoughts are for carefully collecting

while feelings are peeling off the ceiling.

 

Patronize

 

Become accustomed to bestow

custom unto one below.

 

Peace

 

If un-swung one oughtn’t swing

the business end of anything.

 

Pen

 

A squid obscures the foes which it engages,

be they fish, or empty pages.

 

Penny

 

A bit of shiny copper worth a tiny nearly naught;

lucky plucked when lost, and sold for thoughts.

 

Perfect

 

Just so; even though

your ideal’s my so-so.

 

Person

 

Blood and gut and feeling,

heart and head concealing,

‘til mouth or cheek

spring a leak,

a universe revealing.

 

Philosopher

 

An ancient word for nerd.

Brings to mind a time when few were found

who thought and taught and gathered ‘round.

 

Phone

 

A camera which connects the masses,

finds your way, and does your taxes.

 

Planet

 

Solar puppets dance about their strings

casting shadows out which go unseen.

 

Plastique

 

An adjustable combustible.

 

Poetry

 

A trail of crumb to tempt a mind

to look and seek, explore and find

what before your eye had been expressed,

and what behind is now confessed.

 

Pope

 

Father to the children of creation;

or a political administration.

 

Pornographer

 

Purveyor of performance arts

with casting calls for private parts.

 

Prejudice

 

A vantage from me to you.

The point where I was born

and all my eyes could view.

 

Problem

 

Were solutions as we wish them be,

simple and magical, never would we

lesson learn, or student be.

 

Progress

 

Greener grass he’s going toward,

apple fall, and tumble forward.

 

Prophet

 

Submitted patents pending

rubber-stamping reinventing.

 

Punctuated Equilibrium

 

Hopeful monsters on the hill

climbed to find themselves until

one day one fell, and carried hope away

with wings it took a spill to splay.

 

Quarter

 

A half a half is half and not;

25 in coin, and half in thought.

 

Quest

 

A noble search to distant plains;

pajamas rich with Cheeto stains.

 

Quilt

 

Took the time to bind with string

effort went and comfort bring.

 

Quit

 

To choose to lose, or end an overuse

of that which now does not amuse.

 

Radio

 

A universe of beauty we can’t see,

until attuned by love and wound

unto the proper frequency.

 

Rain

 

When a pregnant water body drains,

the sky comes down with sympathy pains.

 

Rainbow

 

The spectrum seen as all inclusive,

though black and white do seem elusive.

 

Randy

 

A name bestowed by those who named,

nine months past they were the same.

 

React

 

To be equal in opposition,

absent of your own volition.

 

Reassure

 

To show a heart that knows again

that in its ears were only fears;

whisperings of malcontent

felt as meant, for many years.

 

Recommit

 

To adore some more may mend amore.

 

Reform

 

Adjust a jot or tittle to

improve a lot, or little do.

 

Reincarnate

 

Sacred cow does see a light,

opening of tunnel bright.

Re-cast to play a pungent role

beyond this bowl for passing souls.

 

Reptile

 

Hatched from whom it had no say;

over with, and underway.

 

Résumé

 

The raised skirt and roadside naked knee

of a working class economy.

 

Right

 

On the one hand the opposite of left,

and on the other one the only choice that’s left

if all the others are perverse.

Which leaves the third:

a forgotten soldier’s end

and remembered debt incurred.

 

Rimming

 

To sanctify a holy thing

which hopefully is sparkling.

 

Ritual

 

Willful effort will assign

worth in one’s unconscious mind.

 

Road

 

We whine away the time in DMV,

in which we wait, to wait in line in SUV.

 

Romantic

 

That which makes a heart beat fast,

body still, and question asked.

 

Sacred

 

An enemy in the making when

one cannot hope to make amends,

once against it he offends.

 

Salmon

 

A fin to go, a fin to stay,

an effin’ waterfall to lay.

 

Sand

 

Grit to mark each eon as it passes;

granules in grand canyon hourglasses.

 

Science

 

Set a spell upon a tree

of knowledge ever after,

thereupon did Isaac see

an apple fall, and gathered.

 

Scripture

 

A man of mystery, worlds apart

every moral did impart,

ghost-written in assistant’s hand;

vicarious divine commands.

 

Seat Belt

 

Strips of straps to bar your bones

from being thrown by known unknowns.

 

Second

 

A paradox I reckoned,

as the first was also second.

 

Sensual

 

All response to stimuli

apparent to the naked I.

 

Settle

 

All too many all too often do

aim too low and opt for any;

wait and want were hard to do.

 

Sex

 

To touch, taste, hear and see,

receptive to, and thrilled to be

with without and in-between,

open to, and emptying.

 

Shame

 

A shun by any other name

twists a child’s wrist the same.

 

Shoe

 

Mountain climbing’s more climactic,

with this global prophylactic.

 

Siamese

 

To be to a sibling wed,

a step behind, a head ahead.

 

Sideways

 

Doesn’t mean a thing to me

in light of relativity.

 

Simile

 

Comparing aft and fore

like or as a metaphor.

 

Skeptic

 

One who does in place of gods,

put Fact and Not, which in their grace

they saw not fit to sort and sift,

into their proper place.

 

Snipe

 

To correspond without return,

removed from whom it does concern.

 

Snow

 

A fowl’s flea a downy forest sees,

the sky a disco of frosted stained glass windows

beyond all hope of explanation,

falling sideways in formation.

 

Spoon

 

Adolescent protégé

to medieval trebuchet.

 

Sprain

 

Joint, muscle and tendon do

tend to mend when tended to.

 

Squircle

 

Squares which circle back abound,

where other squares are not around.

 

Street Sign

 

Tombstone to a spruce or pine

that could’ve stood the test of time.

 

Symbiosis

 

Giving and begetting,

neither taking nor regretting.

 

Table

 

A bit of whittle flat and still

held down by abdominal protrusion ‘til

the meal is done and only bones remain,

dishes passing to another plane.

 

Tax

 

A bit of common profit kept aside,

in principle to profit you and I.

 

Television

 

A faucet dripping pungent waters

onto sponges: sons and daughters.

 

Temptation

 

To off and on and often see

what so ought, and oughtn’t be.

 

Temptress

 

A she who hopes to help refrain

from every effort to abstain.

 

Therapist

 

Into darkened tunnel trains,

cutting teeth on broken brains.

 

Thermos

 

A vault if wanting in

and prison going out.

 

Thick

 

Wide, when something underneath resides.

If on the other outside it were found,

we would simply go around.

 

Thunder

 

I always hark to hear the arcs

of gigantic static sparks.

 

Thrust

 

To scooch upon a cooch when pelvic,

or sink a sword to redden velvet.

 

Time

 

A fib we sip with morning brew,

as if it’s morning in Peru.

 

Together

 

Both to be, and coincide;

by and by, and I aside.

 

Tile

 

One quadrant in a grid of grout

you glued to kick the carpet out.

 

Tornado

 

It spins. If we were spun we’d come undone.

 

Tragedy

 

Martyrs of a faith we have not named

put our grievances to shame.

 

Travel

 

Every place you’ve ever been

has never been the same again.

 

Tree

 

A root uprooted that believes,

it’s not a root for having leaves.

 

Trimester

 

Awaren’t, apparent, a parent.

 

Troll

 

To see a bridge and not to stroll;

instead to try to take a toll.

 

Twinge

 

A heartstring on a hook

that’s hard to overlook.

 

Union

 

Lend a little muscle to

men who build, and break for you.

 

Universe

 

I cannot help but find absurd

the sum of all summed up

in just one word.

 

Vacuum

 

Just as lust and distance can attract,

a void deprived of substance too will act

as siren call to atoms passing near;

a quantum aphrodisiac.

 

Vagina

 

A theme park fit for men and women;

unbefitting infants to whom leaving is required,

and entrance is forbidden.

 

Vegan

 

Meat-eating bosses mean life losses

and vegans job security,

for in cannibal country we can’t be canned

while canning at the cannery.

 

Verb

 

A home indeed for those in need

of a title to a deed.

 

Vibrator

 

A siege upon a castle gate

to breach a breach but then abate

should the captain of the cavalry

need a fresh replacement battery.

 

Villain

 

Every part completes the whole,

a hero made heroic

by each supporting role.

 

Vote

 

A decision made by wizened ones who had

hung their hopes for change on hanging chads.

 

War

 

Selected by those we elected,

representing our good will until

we willed to war, and good defected.

 

Waste

 

Potential which, once cast away

can be expressed a different way.

 

We

 

Said of a collective,

together or respective.

 

Weed

 

A plant un-wanted among your garden reeds,

though some may only shun the stems and seeds.

 

Wheel

 

That for which a lesson’s meant

not to have to reinvent.

 

Withdraw

 

Seek to lest you peak abreast.

 

Wrapper

 

Alack, a lark of licking stopped

momentarily but oft,

to crop the crinkled top atop

a paper-padded lollipop.

 

Wrong

 

Everything and nothing seems perverse

given keen perspective or averse.

Depending who you question they will see

right or wrong in you or me.

 

X-Ray

 

Private doc and sunken socket do

adore a game of peek-a-boo.

 

Yell

 

To tersely talk in coarse vibration;

loosened by profuse libation.

 

Yellow

 

The primary way

to color one who runs away.

 

Young

 

Yet to be forgotten

or literally rotten.

 

Yours

 

That which I have yet to take

from within, and find it’s mate.

 

Zombie

 

A corpse is a corpse of course,

but sometimes it’s striped and a horse,

wandering by day,

saying nothing but “Grraaaaaaaaaaainsss….”

Corpses of zorses in force.

 

Zen

 

To see all as good and bad,

and all that had to happen had.

 

Zygote

 

Heir apparent to a parent’s wealth,

good fortune bid them give the gift of self.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I hope you enjoyed and continue to enjoy my book.

If you do and did, check originalisbetter.com

 

No telling what you might find there.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


The Darndest Dictionary

You will never look at the items, words or aspects of everyday life defined in this book the same way again. Averaging 15 words in length, this book contains hundreds of clever definitions that will amaze, inspire and otherwise entertain you for hours and make you want to read them again and again! And they all rhyme!

  • Author: Mark Namsick
  • Published: 2017-05-04 19:50:11
  • Words: 4575
The Darndest Dictionary The Darndest Dictionary