Copyright 2015 Arlene Nassey
Shakespir Edition, License Notes
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Shakespir.com or your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
So you found the girl of your dreams and you decide she’s a keeper. Just exactly how do you expect to accomplish this? After all, don’t the majority of relationships end in disaster? She wants money, I bet. Money is nice, but you would be dead wrong. She wants a macho man, a big. strong, tough guy. Wrong again. What she wants is a friend that she can trust.
When you hear of a woman bragging about her man you will hear words like ‘My Best Friend’, ‘My Confidant’, ‘We Are One And The Same’, ‘We Bring Out the Best In Each Other’, etc, etc. If these feelings are not there, there’s nothing to brag about. There’s always envy from the women who are missing out on a relationship like this and they are very deserving of the same.
I do realize that it is a two way street. Nobody wants to be saddled with anyone that they need to wait on hand and foot. Nobody should feel burdened and alone in a relationship. This type of a relationship is not a partnership, it is more like a prison sentence. Believe me, nobody can grow in a relationship like that. Trust is an essential component to any relationship if it is going to work in any sense of the word. You need to help each other in every way you can think of. Don’t think of what you can get from them. Think of what you can do for them. The little things mean more than you think. Let’s go through the main components of a relationship. These essentials will help you to avoid the main pitfalls of a relationship. If you get these down pat, you will be well on your way to a satisfying and long lasting relationship that you never dreamed was possible.
The most important component to a lasting relationship is to have respect for each other. When respect is gone, the relationship is gone. the main thing that attracts you to the other is a respect for them. You want a relationship with somebody that you have a great respect for. To further embellish on respect, you need to respect what she has to say. Do not dismiss her as an idiot that doesn’t know what she is talking about. Actually listen to what she has to say. You may, or may not agree with what she has to say. She still deserves the respect to be listened to. Who knows? You might just learn something. Treating her with respect shows her that she matters to you.
Always thinking of her first in everything you do is not only wise, it shows the respect you have for her in every aspect. Ask for her opinion on something you plan to do. Don’t go behind her back and do it without giving her enough respect to at least let her know your thoughts on what you want to do. Chances are, she will like the idea that you included her in your plans.
Rather than critisizing her for her efforts or making fun at her expense, you need to give her encouragement. So she made an effort to cook you a special meal that she hadn’t tried making before. It didn’t turn out as planned but you bite your tongue and say something positive about it that is not a sarcastic remark. DO NOT criticize her for trying something new to give you a variety in your meals. She made an effort and it should be appreciated for what it is.
She decides that she needs to lose a few pounds. Don’t continually go on about her weight. Encourage her by doing without those fattening foods that she is trying to avoid as well. It wouldn’t hurt you to avoid eating things around her that she cannot eat while she is attemping to succeed at this. When she has been on this regiment for a bit make sure you let her know that you notice a difference and she is looking good.
When she comes home to say she is thinking about putting in for a promotional posting at work you need to be supportive and genuinely hopeful that she will get the promotion. If she fails at getting the job she needs to be encouraged to go for the next posting and she will surely get the job.
Encouragement goes a long way in keeping a relationship working.
Chances are now a days, both people are working and time is precious. If you get home first from work make sure you do some work that makes life a bit easier for her. Don’t just flop on the couch and wait for her to come home. Do something that shows you made an effort to make life easier for her. Start dinner by prepping the potatoes, veggies, and meat, even if you are not a cook. You can at least peel the potatoes ready for the meal to make it easier. They can sit covered in the water ready to be cooked. Take out the garbage, throw in a load of laundry, or dishes to wash. Something that helps out before she gets home. You don’t have to do everything. Do something that shows you made the effort. Offer to take the kids to or from soccer games or dance recitals or whatever transportation needed that frees up her time so that she is not so rushed and worn out all the time. It will be very much appreciated.
This is where the time saving pays off big time. The romance department doesn’t need to be expensive or extravagant to be effective. You’re having take out pizza and soft drinks. this can be made romantic with a few candles for soft lighting for relaxation. If you have a fireplace sit by the fireside relaxing and enjoying each other’s company. Turn off all the communication devices like phones, televisions, computers. With the exception of some mood music just relax and enjoy the moments together. Board games or card games shouldn’t be underestimated in bringing you closer together. You need to make time for romance night at least once a week to make it consistant.
When you are on your way home stop by a grocer and pick up some inexpensive flowers. They are just as appreciated as the more expensive ones. Surprise flowers are always welcomed. There doesn’t need to be an occasion. Pick her up her favourite treat every now and again without even so much as a hint of a request. Show her that you are thinking of her.
Words of appreciation go a long way. Let her know when you notice her looking good. Tell her dinner tasted delicious. Thank her for taking good care of the kids. DO NOT take her for granted. DO NOT assume that she is just doing her job. Taking care of a family, home, and a job is not an easy task. She needs to know that you appreciate the effort that she makes to turn your family house into a home. Look for the positive in her rather than finding fault. Everyone has faults. The more you look for faults in her, the more you will find.
Have a sense of humility. Laugh at yourself and let her see the human side of you. Talk to her about your work and your coworkers and what everyone is up to. Tell her of your dreams and aspirations. Maybe she can help you achieve some of them. You never know until you open up and discuss everything. DO NOT assume that her dreams are the same as yours and DO NOT expect them to be the same. There is a middle road that can make the path an enjoyable and successful one for both of you. Above all, you need to talk about all aspects of your life in order for each other to be part of your life.
Trust is a major one. There can be no relationship without trust. If you do not trust, then everything is tainted. Jealousy poisons every aspect with suspicion. The vile, green monster has no place in a healthy relationship. Jealousy breaks down all other aspects of a relationship. It creeps it’s ugly fingers into every area and doesn’t let go. You must trust her and let her know that you trust her to be honest with you and faithful. Once a trust is broken it is very difficult to mend. It can be done. It would take some time before trust is restored.
You must learn to adapt to her relationships with her friends. Her friends are important to her and so they should be important to you as well. You may not care for some of them but they are her friends and you must respect that. The same respect should also be given to your friends as well. You do not attempt to destroy her friendships because of your own preference to one or another. It won’t hurt you to tolerate her choice of friends. This goes for relatives as well. You need to have respect for her parents as well as your own.
In the bedroom you need to remember that this is not a race to the finish line. This is a relaxing time continuation of the romance situation. Gentle massaging and taking it slow is the mode of the time spent there. Need I say more?
Does all this sound like too much work to be bothered with? Ask yourself this; Is she worth the effort? If the answer is no, then you don’t deserve to be in a relationship. Keep in mind that all of the above actually applies to both parties. The problem with a lot of men is that they don’t look at it that way. Too often women make the sacrifices and the men take them for granted. I am well aware that this is not always the case but more often than not, it is. No woman on the face of this earth deserves less.
If she is a KEEPER she is well worth the courtesy of treating her like she is an important part of your life. Your children are watching how you treat their mother. Make a good impression on them.
If you treat your family like dirt you should not expect them to stay.
Thank you for reading my book.
If you enjoyed it please feel free to leave a comment.
She's a Keeper So you found the girl of your dreams and you decide she's a keeper. Just exactly how do you expect to accomplish this? After all, don't the majority of relationships end in disaster? She wants money, I bet. Money is nice, but you would be dead wrong. She wants a macho man, a big. strong, tough guy. Wrong again. What she wants is a friend that she can trust. When you hear of a woman bragging about her man you will hear words like 'My Best Friend', 'My Confidant', 'We Are One And The Same', 'We Bring Out the Best In Each Other', etc, etc. If these feelings are not there they have nothing to brag about. There's only envy from the women who are missing out on a relationship like this and are very deserving of the same.