By: Taylor McBride
Cynical Saints Publishing©
Table Of Contents
SETTING: Inside the restaurant, seated at the table, in order from left to right are Fredator, Gabby, Jawny, Mary, Othello, and Bobby. Behind them on the table are half eaten bagel bites.
Gabby P: So Fred, did you enjoy the speaker tonight at my home group?
Fredator: I was thoroughly impressed.
Jawny: I’m definitely trying to recovah, but the moment I stop havin’ fun with it I’m done with it. Yahmean?
Fredator: Gabby, I noticed when we went around and introduced ourselves, you identified as an alcoholic AND an addict.
Gabby P: Well yeah, my main thing was drugs. But, Mary told me that, at the end of the day, this is a program about drinking. Like, the first time we went for coffee, Mary was like, (impersonating Mary) “Do you think you have a drinking problem?” And I’m like, “Obvi.” Then she asked me, (impersonating Mary) “Well do you have a desire to stop drinking?” To which I responded, “Fuck yes, I have a desire to stop drinking!” So Mary just told me to say that I’m an alcoholic/addict. But, yeah, a lot of times, since my main thing was dope, and it always talks about whiskey and wine and stuff, I just kind of ignore words in the book, and even what I hear in meetings, and I just change them in my mind. How do I explain it? I guess it’s like when you get a stupid text message from someone, and you see it, but you just kind block it out and ignore it, and go on living your life instead. Does that make sense? Like it’s important to unify myself with everyone else, yaknow Fred? Unity! (laughs at herself)
Fredator: So you’re saying that identifying yourself as both an addict AND an alcoholic, unifies you with everyone else? Fascinating.
Gabby P: Totes McGoats!
(Gabby, Jawny, and Fredator continue talking amongst themselves)
Mary: Thank you for carrying the message tonight Bobby.
Hey, it’s the least I could do.
It’s funny, Numerous Lunar Cycles ago, when I crash landed in Wet Socks Anonymous, becoming a “polished public speaker” was not exactly high on my priority list. I guess they call that a fringe benefit….
Bobby K: I couldn’t help but notice you back at the meeting.
Othello, was it? That took a lot of courage, just showing up.
Sometimes, it’s all the guster we can muster just to walk through those doors.
You just weren’t ready to say the words.
Hell, when I materialized into my first meeting, I didn’t even give my real name!
Othello: Well, I’ve actually been clean for eight years in the other fellowship.
Mary: You mean the Brookline Young People Group?
Othello: No the OTHER fellowship.
Bobby K: I’m not sure what other fellowship you are referring to.
Othello: (long pause looking back and forth between Mary and Bobby)…
Othello: High Socks Anonymous
Mary: You know what they say, “Wet socks dry out, but high socks never come down.”
Othello: Aw, Mary, you’re so pretty when you don’t talk.
Mary: Hey! (indignant) Fuck you!
Bobby K: Well, that’s stupendous.
It’s all the same,
a drug is a drug is a drug is a drug is a drug is a drug
I think I went to High Socks once,
that’s the one where you guys light the candles and listen to records backwards? I’m kidding.
Just out of curiosity, do you guys use the Big Wet Book?
Othello: We don’t use any outside literature because that would not be in line with our Traditions.
Bobby K: Ah, but each group is autonomous.
Othello: Are you going to finish the sentence?
Bobby K: Each group is autonomous, so that’s their business.
Othello: They are not autonomous when their actions affect other groups or give a false impression of the fellowship as a whole, for instance by implying that we have some affiliation with some other organization. No? You’re looking at me like I have thirteen fingers.
Mary: It’s not that you have thirteen fingers, it’s that you want to tell other people how to work their recovery.
Othello: Now that you mention it, wasn’t Thirteen Fingers the name of your auto-biography, pretty girl?
Bobby K: There’s quite a few groups out there that do things I don’t agree with, but I just try to keep my head above water and stay out of it.
Othello: Would you perhaps mind elaborating? Could you give me an example?
Bobby K: Ok. Sure. Have you ever heard of the Dry Cycle Group?
Othello: No, I can’t say that I have.
Well they really work a good program, but, they do some things that I don’t agree with.
For instance, in order for a sock to attend, they must have been washed that very same day, and permanent pressed with starch. They have a person that stands at the door, and if the bouncer can’t see a crease in your sock, you’re not getting in.
Othello: Wow, that is insane, if you don’t mind me saying. That is out of line.
Bobby K: Well, it’s just what they believe in.
But, speaking of standing for something, you must have noticed that we here in Wet Socks Anonymous, have a problem,
well not necessarily a problem, but a situation rather, with immigration.
There’s a lot of immigrants coming in, who have even more severe problems than alcohol,
with other extra-curricular activities.
Othello: You mean like heroin?
Actually, I would love to ask you something.
Bobby K: I would love to build a wall, and make High Socks pay for it. No, I’m just joking. Seriously, what would you like to ask me?
Othello: Well I’ve studied your literature. I’ve found some information that clearly lays out that there is a singleness of purpose, a clear identity to help people who have a drinking problem. But, I look around and I see heroin addicts, or pill heads, or crack heads, or whatever, who make no secret about the fact that they never had a problem with alcohol,. Does this upset you? Does it upset you that they wear their drug addiction like a badge of honor, and show no respect for the singleness of purpose? Do you think there is a shift happening to become more universal?
Mary: I’m really sorry Othello, it was just a joke, I used to go there with Gabby.
Othello: Apology accepted. I’m really curious to hear your experience on this Bobby.
Mary: Well I don’t speak for everyone but I personally don’t see what all the fuss is—
Gabby P: (interrupting Mary) Othello, have you ever been on a duck tour?
Jawny: This chick has nevah been on a duck touah. You gotta go on one dood, it’s hilarious, ridin’ around in a big duck. You know they go on land and watah. They are ambidextrous. It’s fuckin awesome. They teach you the Blue Line is called the Blue Line because it’s the only subway line that goes underwatah. The Green Line goes across the Bawston Cawmmons, so it’s green. They teach you all kinds of shit about the city.
Gabby P: That explains the Orange Line!
Jawny: I don’t remember that one.
Gabby P: You’ve never noticed the urine smell on the Orange Line? It’s like famous for that. Wait a second guys! Jawny, now that you mention it…speaking of ducks…you kind of sound like one.
Jawny: Oh you got jokes now.
Gabby P: (in a very nasal voice that sounds like a duck quacking but also sounds like Jawny’s voice) waAack waAack bUddy doOd gUy kiid. Oh my god, L.O.L., you hundo-P sound like a duck!
(Gabby, Fredator, and Jawny return to their philosophical discussion of duck tours)
Othello: (turns back to Bobby) Anyways.
Bobby K: Shall I continue?
Othello: By all means.
Bobby K: I see it every day.
It’s usually some bleeding-heart, liberal Alcoholic, who just wants to help, will tell the addict,
if you’re in fact an addict, then, you are also powerless over alcohol.
So, the addict falls in line with us. But, they don’t get the help they need.
They don’t improve their condition.
Because they are not an alcoholic, they are an addict.
That is why it’s so important to figure out exactly what disease you suffer from.
Like a triage nurse, we must first identify what the problem is,
We have to get to the exact nature.
(the A and B are silent, they are just for emphasis)
There is a difference between (A) an alcoholic who is also an addict,
and (B) an alcoholic who is powerless over drugs.
I’ve sponsored alcoholics who thought they were alcoholics, but found out later they were actually tweakers.
I’ve sponsored addicts who turned out not to be addicts at all but were drunkards.
We have to get to the exact nature.
Othello: Maybe the reason why those addicts don’t get well is not because there are two different diseases, but rather, because they lack the identification necessary to feel a part of. The very same “singleness of purpose” that makes you guys so monumentally successful at what you do, leaves some left out.
Bobby K: Yes, but, alcoholism is a different disease from drug addiction, duh.
Othello: Don’t take my curiosity as hostility.
Bobby K: Look, I believe 100% that alcohol is a drug. Ok?
Don’t get me wrong.
I believe 100% that a drug is a drug is a drug.
But, I was eating an apple the other day, and I found later, it was also a fruit.
Are you a steak guy? Do you like a good steak?
Othello: I’ve been known to enjoy a good steak.
Bobby K: Just making sure you weren’t one of those vegetarian socks made out of recycled hemp.
Well, it’s sort of like Kobe beef. All Kobe Beef is Wagyu but not all Wagyu is Kobe.
Recently, I sponsored a man who thought he was an alcoholic/addict, but, in his inventory, it turned out, he only smoked crack on the weekends, with his cousin Smitty.
He was able to stop smoking crack four years before he was able to quit drinking. Therefore, he’s a real alcoholic, but he’s not an addict.
Othello: I sponsored a man that later realized she identified as a woman.
Mary: HA! Now, that’s good.
Othello: Seriously. No bullshit.
Mary: Do you sponsor Fred?
Othello: I sponsor Fred’s sponsor. As far as the weekend crack smoking, I don’t think that really proves he was not an addict. My training in sponsorship has taught me that when I’m looking at unmanageability I should focus on the using and how it made me feel, rather than hanging my hat on the stopping. Stopping is never promised, even for you Bobby, you could wake up drunk tomorrow, with all due respect. Call me a hippie but I just think we are more alike than we are different.
Bobby K: Well, Mr. Othello, you make some interesting points.
Othello: If I may be so bold Sir, I’d like to invite you to examine the fact that when you say that you think alcohol is a drug, you don’t really mean it. In your mind they are not the same at all.
SETTING: Othello’s house. The room is empty.
(The sound of a phone ringing. Othello comes out with a phone on his ear)
(A squiggly, pink, zig-zag line comes across the stage diagonally. Gabby appears on the other side of the divide from Othello)
Gabby P: Hey Othello. It’s Gabby.
Othello: (singing) Hey, What’s Up, Hellooo.
Gabby P: (laughs out loud) Oh, nothing, you know, just trying to stay sober one day at a time.
Othello: Word, word.
Gabby P: Anyways, it was nice meeting you the other night.
Othello: You too. How may I help you Ms. Gabby?
Gabby P: Well, meeting you, and talking to Fred, got me thinking.
Othello: Famous last words, go on.
Gabby P: (laughs out loud) I would love to check out a High Socks meeting sometime.
Othello: Well, you can find the meeting list on the website, or I can give you directions.
Gabby P: Well, what are you doing tonight? Do you want to meet up? Maybe have coffee, and a meeting, and chill.
Gabby P: I won’t cut your thumb off and toss it out the window of a moving vehicle, or something psycho like that, I promise.
Othello: You have a very keen sense for humor, Gabby.
Gabby P: Why thank you, so, you want to go tonight?
Othello: Can we take a rain check, maybe some other time?
Gabby P: I have more than a year if that’s what you are wondering.
Othello: No, it’s not, just, tonight is no good.
Gabby P: Well, what about tomorrow?
Othello: Hey, can I talk to you later? My sponsor Tony is calling me.
Gabby P: You can just say no, ok? I get it.
Othello: No but just let me talk to you later ok?
Gabby P: (sounding annoyed) Really, dude?
(Gabby exits the stage)
Tony Sausages: Wssszzzzaaaaaaap
Othello: Boy, am I glad to hear your voice.
(Tony Sausages appears across the zig-zag line)
Tony Sausages: (imitating Elvis) Thankya, thankya very much.
Othello: I was just on the other line with a girl and honestly it was awkward and I wanted to get off the phone.
Tony Sausages: Where’d you meet this one?
Othello: Kind of a long story, but I met her last night at a Wet Socks Anonymous meeting, actually.
Othello you’re going to the thirsty club now? Is that it?
Where are you headed next? Fucking Octoberfest? Thefuckoutta here!
There’s better places to pick up chicks than Wet Socks Anonymous.!
I hope to God you wear a rubber!
Karen-Renea, Karen-Renea, come in here.
No, yeah, I know put the red sauce on low-medium, Karen-Renea.
Listen, Othello is packing up and taking his talents to South Beach, Karen-Renea.
He’s jumping ships. He’s going somewhere more socially acceptable, where he can rub elbows with fucking high society, and talk about the time they almost got kicked out of the yacht club for only tipping 10%!
Othello: Bro, she stepped to me bro. That is not my motivation for going there.
Tony Sausages: Please enlighten me. Did Moses appear to you with a fucking burning bush? Tell me what high spiritual energies lead you there? Karen-Renea hold on, come in here Karen-Renea, I’m going to walk in a straight line. Am I walking straight? How’s my walking? I think I’m getting a fucking contact buzz just talking to Othello right now.
Othello: I am just trying to practice open-mindedness. They did give us the Steps and Traditions.
Tony Sausages: Whoa, whoa, whoa. I’m just going to stop you right there. Just like the Native Americans gave Christopher Columbus America? They never gave us shit. We took that shit. They didn’t give us a fucking chance in hell. We took the steps from them. Do your history Othello. First of all, they don’t even follow their own Goddamned Traditions. They didn’t even fucking have Traditions for twenty years. Even after they ratified them, they never took them seriously.
High Socks Anonymous was built on both the Steps and Traditions, from day one.
Othello: Fun fact! I never even thought about that.
Tony Sausages: The only support we got from them, was a gentle nudge to get the hell out of their fellowship. They were fucking thrilled at the chance of cleansing their meetings of addicts. They used to tell us we were animals, and kick us out of their meetings.
Go back to the Socksford Group. That shit was before any Twelve Step fellowship. They had six steps which, low and fucking behold, read:
(Step One): Admitted helplessness!
(Step Two): Got honest with self!
(Step Three): Got honest with another!
(Step Four): Made Amends!
(Step Five): Helped another without demand!
(Step Six): Prayed to God as we understood him!
A one-eyed dog could figure out where their steps were copied and pasted from.
Is it stealing if that shit was stolen from jump street? Riddle me that?
Wet Socks’ founder did not fucking invent the Steps. He did not go up to the mountain top and come back down with Twelve stone tablets.
He just took the Socksford Group steps and expanded on them.
Thirty years later we came along, we expanded it again.
We made room in it for all manifestations, not just the drunk Catholic.
We’ve had politicians and law enforcement that fucking base their whole campaign on the platform they will make harsher sentences and life harder for drug addicts.
Going back to study Wet Socks Anonymous is like going back in time. Why don’t you study our own history first? Don’t call me to piss in my ear like this!
Othello: Tony, you called me!
Tony Sausages: Give me a fucking break!
(The flat sound of a dial tone…)
SETTING: Outside the church again. Jawny and Gabby walk up together. Gabby now has a matching mini Red Bull arm just like Jawny.
Fredator: Double trouble.
Mary: Gabby, can I talk to you?
Jawny: Fred you speakin’ tonight? I am in the mood for some fuego, bro. Your ego is not your amigo. Hash tag, bars.
Gabby P: I’m just like really upset right now. Can I tell you guys something?
(Fred disappears for a split second, and comes back wearing a cape)
Fredator: Yes! What happened!
Jawny: Oh shit what did I do now?
Gabby P: You guys know your friend Othello? He’s just fuckin’ creepy. Last night he called me up and was totally hitting on me. First, he starts in about the principle of “unconditional love” but not like in the way we normally talk about it. Then, he told me I’m funny. I know that I’m hilarious, O.K., but I think he clearly had other intentions. But I really am just trying to focus on staying sober today you know? It’s like you meet someone who has allegedly eight years sober and you just assume they live with some spiritual principles. (sobbing) It just made me really uncomfortable. I just need to go inside the meeting.
Mary: That thirteenth-stepping, cripple-fucker!
(Everyone starts to follow Gabby into the meeting)
Fredator: Mary, wait.
Mary: I’m not going on a double date with Gabby and your friend. You heard what she said.
Fredator: Keep in mind that all that came from a girl who just showed up at the meeting with Jawny. No offense. Look, it’s just really hard to believe. Othello likes smart girls. That came out wrong. Honestly, he’s just not really into newcomers. He does not like sponsoring them, dating them, and he even talks about how sometimes, he finds it hard to relate to them. I’m just going to go out on a limb here and say that this is not the first time Gabby has reported this sort of thing in a similar way. Mary, I’m defending my friend because he’s worth defending. I just learned recently that what I’ve been doing is running around projecting my own fucked up relationship issues on to other people and attacking them. My feelings are usually triggered by a thought, and my thinking is fucked up, so of course I feel some kind of way a lot of times over nothing, and this is coming from someone who’s been around for a while and done some work. All I’m saying is keep an open mind about Othello. Also, Gabby is not exactly a cripple. She’s an adult that has over a year clean.
Mary: I’m not that worried about it. Let’s just go inside.
(There is a banner hanging that says Watertown Young Peoples group of Wet Socks Anonymous)
Jose: Good evening, ladies and gentleman. Welcome to the Watertown Young People group of Wet Socks Anonymous. My name is Jose and I’m an alcoholic. Let us open this meeting with the Serenity Prayer
Unison of Voices: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
Jose: The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking. We are not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization or institution, we wish to engage in no controversy, and we neither endorse nor oppose any cause. I’ve asked an alcoholic to read The Unfortunates.
Gabby P: Gabby. Alcoholic. It is rare for us to see someone fall who has attempted with persistence to follow our way of life. But, there are people like that out there. They fall into two types, these unfortunates. The first type is the vampires. They lack the ability to see their own reflection. No matter how long they stare in the mirror, their deceitful vampire nature prevents them from doing an honest inventory. A little delusion is to be expected, but they just take it too far. The second are those with problems other than alcohol. Disclaimer: There are other diseases of the mind and body that make sobriety near impossible, including, but not limited to: bipolar-schizophrenia, autoimmune encephalitis, and obviously drug addiction. Also, sobriety is not legal in Alaska and void where prohibited.
Jose: Thank you Gabby. This is a closed meeting for alcoholics only, real alcoholics. Our format this evening will be an ask-it basket format. Each person will come to the front and share on a topic which they will select at random out of a grab bag. After each person speaks for 3 to 4 minutes, they will set their topic aside and call on the next speaker at random from the audience. Let me first introduce to you our master of ceremonies, Dr. Dave.
(Jose disappears, as if taking an elevator straight down. Dr. Dave comes to the front)
Dr. Dave: I’m Dr. Dave, I’m an alcoholic.
Unison of Voices: Hey Dave. (Hey Dr. Dave, What’s up Doc, etc.)
Dr. Dave: My sponsor may disagree, but I need to share. Frankly, I didn’t even want to come to this meeting tonight. I stayed up late last night watching YouTube videos about the addicted brain. Then, I worked all day in the field. I work with recovering addicts and alcoholics. My job is incredibly tiring. I am out there in the trenches. Getting my fingers dirty, and I mean dirty. I have to hit my knees multiple times each day, I see Jamie looking at me, oh, not the way you think, Jamie, silly. The thing about working out there in the field is that I’m not the one who gets to reap the harvest. My job is to the plant the seed. That’s usually pretty much it. Just put it in the ground and allow the sun to shine on it. Sure, I get to water it from time to time, and we also inject special nutrient rich vitamin sticks now, which keep the plant green for 30 days “When you’re green you’re growing, but when you’re ripe you’re rotten.” It’s very fruitless work, pun intended! I see a lot of parallels between my work and my sobriety. Patience, discipline, sacrifice, helping others, these are all things that I have no other choice but to practice each day in my job. The funniest thing is that the other day after the meeting a young woman approached me and was like, “Hey, how’s your therapy job going?” I just looked at her. She thought I was some kind of addiction and alcohol counselor. I was like, “Honey, I share at every meeting that I work out in a field. A baby corn field.” Well, this year we are also growing baby carrots but mostly baby corn. I was like, “don’t you see all these grass stains on me?” How funny. I’m just part of a huge money making factory, owned by the same guy who owns a bunch of halfway houses, I just slave out there for minimum wage. I’m sure each stalk brings in a hefty profit but I don’t see any of it. Sometimes, I used to feel my work was contributing towards something but lately I just really need to take time away from it and focus on my own sobriety. Which is why I’m here tonight! Yay! And with that I’m going to call our first speaker. You in the back, with the Red bull, the Paul-Walker-looking-gentleman. Nobody? Too soon? You sir, please come up.
(Jawny comes up to take his turn at the podium)
Jawny: I’m an alcoholic, names Jawny.
Unison of Voices: Hi Jawny.
Jawny: I really hate sharing dood, but I know I need to. I’m about to say a true thing. Sponsor people. If you don’t have any sponsees, that’s like going to the bah, and there’s an open bah, with free booze, and one of those cute, fancy, liquor-luge things, shaped like a swan, and NOT having a drink. I’m drunk right now off of sponsoring people. Last week I was sitting up in here feeling some type of way dood, and I still feel some type of way tonight, but not the exact same way, but like a similar way. But the fucking point is dood, ever since I started sponsoring people, I love coming to meetings, and answering my phone when they call. I was only on Step One when I got a sponsee, so guess what I did, I went from zero to twelve, real quick. I used to look up to people in here, but honestly, based on the things I’ve seen recently, I pretty much just look up to myself in here. Earlier today for instance, I’m on the fucking duck touah. I’m just sitting there with a pretty girl just soaking it up enjoying the duck touah and I hear this voice, “Jawnathon? Jawn? Jawny? Is that you?” Turn around and who do I fucking see but my old house manager when I was in the Tube Sock House back in ’07. Fuckin kicked me out because I had one slip. Just cause I took one Neurontin-Gabapentin, just like that, he kicked me out on my ass. He basically did everything he possibly could to make me shoot dope. I’m just sick of people trying to tell me how I should be taking my meds. My body knows the difference between drugs a counselor prescribes for sobriety and drugs I prescribe myself to get high. So he’s like, “Jawny how’s the Johnnies?” fucking trying to embarrass me in front of my girl dood. And guess what fucking around with me he picked the wrong one. So I’m like, “Are you a dawctah now guy? Do you have your fucking dawctah’s license dood? Oh, yeah, we know. You never went to dawctah school you’re just some fuck on a duck touah. Quit pretending to be a dawctah and enjoy the duck touah. If you don’t back up dood, I’m going to fuckin knawck your blawck off dood. I will fucking sawck you right in your sock if you don’t shut up and fucking enjoy the duck touah. Come at me bro. I’ll turn you into fabric softener, real quick.” It’s whatever though dood. Some people sitting in here mad right now. They don’t want you to share about shooting dope. They don’t want you to have problems other than alcohol. It’s whatever, I give zero fucks right now. Then I come to the meeting tonight and find out people who claim to be my friend, allegedly, trying to run game on my girl, dood. Coming here, hiding out like some fucking double agent. What are you doing here bro, some kind of secret spy mission? Bro, you are not fucking James Bond. Check it dood, you are not fucking Austin Powers. Nahmean? You do not make her horny baby. You do not make her randy baby. No, you don’t. If anything dood, you are like, what is that guy’s name? The retahded one. Oh yeah, Mr. Bean. Dood, if anything you’re Mr. Bean. Fuck this. I’m outty. You with the dreads, you next.
(Jawny drops his Red Bull and walks out)
(Lenox walks up to the podium)
Lenox: Dem now listnin’ to that fucktalk now, something that you want none of. Dis program now, full of the smartest dummies on eart’. Dem show you one image now, ain’t even close to the image that’s layed out in the book, boi.
Dr. Dave: Ummmm, excuse me! Who are you!
Lenox: WhoamI? Don’tchu know already who I am? Most holy on high blessed me to be called Lenox. Don’tchya go an’ forget it, boi. This alcoholic goes by the name Lenox. Dem fancy scholars at dem fancy schools still can’t answer de question who built the pyramids, and why dey built dem. Do you know dat? Lenox not here to tell you ‘bout how dis program works now, Lenox not here to speak on why dis program works. Lenox here now to giveya my experiences wit’ doing the work, boi. Lenox don entered into the world of the spirit now. Are ya strong enough? Do you have what it takes to go through the book and look deep in the mirror, eh? My First Step don’t have nothing to do with what anybody else is doin’ now. Nothing in my First Step shows me being a victim of circumstances. Lenox! Time to pay your own way now. Only the strong survive in here. All dat witherin and moanin, concernin who did what, has no meanin’ no more for Lenox.
We not here to convince no one dat there’s merely one path into the light now. If the work we done means anything at all, then clearly it means, that all of us, regardless of color, creed, choice, are the children of the universe. We not here to cause no one no friction based on their religious ceremonies.
Lordavmercy! Lenox don’ need no prescription now for what dem call medicinal ganja. The most high ordered me. Lenox arrived in these halls long time ago now. Lenox was dying of thirst. Red stripe only made me thirst stronger, every drip-drop, I drank it up. My thirst split me lips, turned me eyes yellow, pulled me chin down, so that me walk staring at the ground, ashamed of me drinkin’, ashamed of me lyin, ashamed of me cheatin’ and stealin’, only through doin’ dis work, I found it was holy water me needed to quench my thirst. Being convinced of dis, all sorts of most remarkable tings started to happen forme now. Me words fail to describe the experiences come to me now. Like the water on the shore, it comes and goes, and ebbs and flows, and it’s always beautiful. Me gon be movin’ on now. But here, me won ask Mary to come now and finish what Lenox started now.
Unison of voice: Thanks for sharing.
(Lenox leaves the podium and returns to the audience and Mary comes up to the podium)
Mary: Wow. I literally have goosebumps. There are no words. Thank you for calling on me Mr. Tall-Dark-And-Handsome. I have not been to many meetings lately. That dark side of me has been really present. It’s so seductive, that dark side. Just for the record I’m no longer referring to Lenox although he is very seductive. I’m talking about my own personal demon. There’s been a lot of talk about birds here tonight, swans, and ducks, and other water fowl. Well I live in an empty nest. But it does not feel empty. My dark side is really there. My house is like those Paranormal Activity movies. I’m not trying to be all depressing, it’s not a very hopeful message for the newcomer since I’m sitting up here with 18 years sober. Yeah that’s right I’m 18 years old, I’m legal Lenox. Just kidding. Aye, aye, aye. But yeah, I have a friend named Jeremy who says life is all about those small victories. I had one of those small victories today and I’d like to share it with you all. On the way over here tonight, I was listening to a playlist that I made. The thing is, normally when I make a playlist, even in sobriety, I make it based on what someone else would like, or based on what they would think of me if they heard me listening to it. I wish I was more badass, so, I make a Metallica playlist, which by the way, sounds more like classical music sometimes. But see, that’s exactly the point I will make a playlist of music I don’t even like. In my drinking, I was constantly trying to hide who I was. Constantly pretending to be a good girlfriend, or what I thought that was. Constantly pretending to be a functioning member of my family, even though my definitions of family roles, come to find out, are really fucked up. Let’s say, hypothetically, I invited you to go to a meeting together. I would creep on your Facebook and try to guess what type of music you liked, then I would stay up making a playlist of a music, based on a profile of you that I had created, based on profile of you that you had created, on a site that’s mostly about pretending to be something you’re not. Then, after we get in the car, I’d put the playlist on, and causually be like ,”Oh yeah this is some old playlist, haven’t listened to it in a while.” Then, I’d accuse YOU of creeping on MY Facebook, just for kicks. But today, on the way to this meeting, I listened to MY playlist. It’s my playlist! (Fighting back tears). I am free to be me today. I’m no longer burning energy foolishly trying to create a playlist I think you will like. And with that, next, I’d like to hear from Othello.
Unison of Voices: Thank you Mary.
Dr. Dave: (very pouty voice) I’m not trying to run the show but nobody is picking a topic out of the hat!
(Mary goes and sits down. Othello very slowly comes up)
Othello: I’m Othello and I don’t want to drink today. I’m very reluctant to share tonight, maybe reserved is a better word. I’m not really sure what the protocols are and I just don’t want to do anything that would be disrespectful to anyone.
Jose: (from nowhere) Just be honest man.
Othello: (looks around confused) This meeting has been very interesting to say the least. I’ve been coming to for about a week now and I’ve studied the Book and tonight I’ve enjoyed the speakers, well, some of them, and I appreciate the chance to participate. You guys have something really good going on here.
Jose: (from nowhere) Searching and fearless Othello, searching and fearless. Be honest.
Othello: I’ve been clean and in recovery for eight years in another twelve step fellowship.
(Silence, then crickets chirping.)
Jose: (From nowhere, in a soft voice) There’s another twelve step fellowship?
Othello: Anyways, thanks for letting me share.
(Othello goes and sits down. Jose raises up behind the podium)
Jose: We are now out of time. Thank you to all our speakers, and thank you to our master of ceremonies Dr. Dave. Would you please join me in closing this meeting with the Lord’s Prayer.
Voices in unison: Our Father…
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