Santa Claus Adventures


Santa Claus Adventures

By Arnie Lightning

Arnie Lightning Books


Shakespir Edition

Copyright © 2016 by Hey Sup Bye Publishing

All rights reserved. Graphics used in this book are licensed and © Dollar Photo Club. This book is a work of fiction. No part of this book or this book as a whole may be used, reproduced, or transmitted in any form or means without written permission from the publisher.

Shakespir Edition, License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite ebook retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Table of Contents

Free Gift

Santa Claus Adventures Series Collection


Extreme Makeover: Santa Edition

Dark Christmas

Christmas Flu

So it Begins

Leave a Review

Funny Christmas Jokes

About the Author

[] Free Gift

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[][] Santa Claus Adventures Series Collection

(Collect the Entire Series)


[] Run!

There are a handful of things that all children know about Santa Clause. He is very kind, he looks good in red, on the night of Christmas Eve every year he sneaks into billions of homes leaving gifts for all of the good little boys and girls across the globe, he has a fluffy white beard, and his belly shakes like a bowl full of jelly.

It’s that last little bit of information that was concerning jolly old Saint Nick on a sleepy summer evening. Obesity is a big problem (no pun intended) and on that night in his bedroom at the North Pole Santa made a very important decision: he decided to get healthier!

And one of the most important parts of getting in shape (really one of the most important parts of life in general) is to set goals, so Father Christmas made a promise to himself that by the end of the year he would run a marathon!

That meant he was going to run a full 26.2 miles without stopping! It’s the last 0.2 miles that really get you.

The big guy in red started out taking it pretty easy, just running about a mile a day for the first week, and then slowly adding a little distance to his jog each time. And because having the people you love support you is so important, whenever Saint Nick felt like he couldn’t run another step, one of his elves would run up beside him, tell Father Christmas they believed in him, and promise him cookies and milk if he ran just a little farther!

One of the most amazing things about setting goals and working hard is that it can be super inspiring to the people around you!

Soon Santa wasn’t just running on his own, he was joined by some of the elves. And then the reindeer started running, too! And then Mrs. Clause! By the time the day of the marathon came around, the whole North Pole was in tip-top shape!

When the starter’s pistol fired to kick off the race, hundreds, even thousands, of elves and deer and penguins took off toward the finish line!

But even for people and elves in great condition a marathon can be a brutal, punishing trial. Santa was cruising right along when, around the twenty mile mark, his muscles started to tighten and cramp! But Santa doesn’t know the meaning of the word quit! He gritted his teeth and pushed through the pain!

It was hard, slow going, but Saint Nick is tough and determined! He was going to make it! Then, with only those last three hundred yards to go, the unthinkable happened: Santa’s legs completely locked up! They refused to go forward even one more inch.

Santa was heartbroken! He had worked so hard for so long and he was so close! He could see the finish line, he wanted to move, his spirit was strong but his body just wouldn’t cooperate.

Father Christmas stood there for a few moments trying to work out what to do when something magical happened. He sneezed. And when he sneezed he, without thinking about it, took a step backwards!

The big guy realized that, though he couldn’t force his legs to move forward, if he just turned around and went in reverse he would still be going the right way!

So that’s exactly what Santa did! He ran the last three hundred yards of the race backwards! And when he crosses that finish line he was so happy, and so proud.

With determination, hard work, and a little creativity everything is possible!

[][] Extreme Makeover: Santa Edition

One night, not very long ago, at his workshop in the North Pole, Santa Clause was a little bored. He loved his job, it was the best job in the world! He got to bring joy to billions of good little boys and girls every year! What could be better than that? And he loved his life. He had a wonderful wife, great friends, and nine awesome reindeer. It was a wonderful life to be sure! But he still wanted to spice things up a little. He had been Santa for hundreds of years, wearing the same red suit, with the same black boots and white hair and fluffy beard.

He decided he wanted to change things up just a little. He wanted a makeover!

He told one of his favorite elves, a young man named wacky, who worked in the experimental gifts section at the workshop, and of course wacky offered to help. Because that’s what friends do.

They began by shaving Santa’s beard! First they gave him huge, silly sideburns called muttonchops! That left him with a long, silly type of beard called a fu manchu! But Santa felt that made him look a little too much like a heavy metal guitar player or a goat. So they shaved that into a bushy mustache. “I look like a truck driver in 1972!” Santa said.

“I thought that’s what we were going for!” Wacky said.

“Of course there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being a 70s trucker,” Santa said. “I’m just not sure it’s me.”

So Wacky shaved Santa’s face clean. Then they moved on to the hairdo. They tried a pony tail, a side pony, pigtails, a Mohawk, dreadlocks, all kinds of stuff, but nothing felt quite right. So wacky just shaved all the hair on the top off too!

“I look like that gentleman from the cleaning products!” Santa said.

“Well,” wacky said. “It’s easy to manage at least!”

Lastly wacky tried out some new looks for Santa’s wardrobe. They tried a lovely three-button suit, a hooded sweatshirt with jeans, and a big faux fur coat with a fedora!

But Santa just didn’t think any of it was right.

Then Santa said, “I have an idea! I think it’s perfect. Santa then reached into his magic bag and pulled out a very special, enchanted, chocolate chip cookie. He took a big bite and, with a flash of light and tinsel, Father Christmas grew back his big white beard! He grew back his white hair, and his big red suit appeared on his body. “There we go,” Santa said. “I believe this is the perfect look for me.”

“But that’s what you always look like!” Wacky said.

“I know,” answered Santa, with a great, wide smile on his face. “In a world where I can be anything at all, I just want to be myself. Because who I am is pretty great.”

Wacky said, “I can’t argue with that, big guy!” And the two went back to work, feeling very lucky to live the lives they loved.

[][] Dark Christmas

It might seem downright crazy to most of us, but some people really hate Christmas. For many people all across the world Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year. It is a time for joy and giving, for peace and understanding. But there are a few people who just can’t stand the holiday season. One of those people was a dastardly gentleman named Dark Meansies!

Dark hated Christmas so much that last year he vowed to stop the holiday from happening at all.

It was December 23rd, the night before Christmas Eve, and Santa Clause was testing out a brand new sleigh. This was a sleek, even faster sled that had been invented right there in the North Pole. Santa was taking the sleigh for one last test flight, to make sure all was in ship shape order, when Dark Meansies came out of nowhere in his own Evil sleigh!

Dark’s sled was a big, black, beastly affair equipped with two nasty candy cane missiles!

Dark swept in behind Santa and let his missiles fly! The candy canes slammed into the side of Santa’s sleigh and shattered the entire ship!

Father Christmas barely had time to hit the eject button before the sled shook apart in midair.

But old Saint Nick is faster than you’d think to look at him. He punched the eject button with lightning reflexes, was rocketed out of his ship, his parachute opened, and as he floated safely to the ground he heard Dark cackling in the distance “Har Har har!”

Santa hit the emergency beacon on his watch and within moments Rudolph was there to pick him up and carry Saint Nick back home.

When he did arrive back at the workshop he found his elves preparing for war!

“We’re gonna track that dastardly fiend down and blow up HIS SLED,” said Wacky, a young, very angry elf.

Santa smiled sadly at his helpers and said, “Well of course we’re not going to do that.”

Wacky jumped up and down! “We have to fight fire with fire!”

“No, said Santa. “We are going to fight fire with water. We are going to battle hatred with love. It’s the Christmas way!”

Santa then sat down and pulled up Dark Meansies social media profile. “Are we looking for his address?” Wacky asked. “So we can drop milkshake bombs all over his head!?”

“I am trying to discover why he hates Christmas,” Santa said. “There must be a reason.”

Santa read for hours and hours. And finally he pieced it all together, all his life, more than anything Dark wanted a puppy for Christmas. But his parents, who loved him very much, knew that Dark was very allergic to dogs. Even though it was for a good reason, the fact that Dark never got what he wanted for Christmas made him very angry at the entire holiday.

Christmas Eve rolled around, Santa pulled out the old, unexploded sleigh, and the very first house he visited was Dark Meansies.

When Dark woke the next morning he found, sitting in his living room, a tiny Dalmatian puppy. And hanging around the puppies neck was a one-year supply of allergy pills! All dark had to do was take one pill a day and he could play and cuddle and laugh with his puppy without ever coughing or sneezing at all!

Dark was so happy he began to cry! And he vowed he would always love and cherish Christmas for all the days of his life.

[][] Christmas Flu

Santa Clause is a magical man who lives in a wonderful workshop in the North Pole where he and his helper elves build all of the amazing toys that good little boys and girls will open on Christmas morning. Santa is very kind, very joyful, and very loving. Unfortunately, magical and tremendous as Father Christmas is, even he can still catch the flu!

And one day not very long ago at all, Santa caught the flu at the worst possible time, on Christmas Eve!

Coughing, sneezing, running a fever, and delirious from the sickness, Santa still climbed out of bed, determined to deliver each of his presents to every child in the world. And as soon as he was on his feet he fell right back over again! He landed back in his bed with a thump and said, “Whoops.” He then tried to crawl upright again.

But this time his wife, the lovely and sweet Mrs. Clause, stopped him. “Absolutely not, dear,” she said. “You’re far too sick to go out tonight. You need chicken soup and rest!”

“I can’t disappoint the children!” Santa said desperately trying to make it to his feet again. “I won’t ruin Christmas! That is the exact opposite of what my entire life is about! I’m going to make it! I just need to begin by taking a nap or ten.”

But this time he didn’t even make it halfway up before falling down again. “Oh brother,” he said.

“You’ve done all the preparation,” said Mrs. Clause. “You’ve made your list and checked it twice. You’ve read all the letters and made all the gifts. You just need a little help to make it the last stretch. Everyone needs a little help every now and again. This is why we have friends who love us and care for us very much!”

He didn’t like it, but Santa agreed, because he didn’t have much of a choice. He was very sick. So while Santa tried to rest up Mrs. Clause got on the phone. Only minutes later Frosty the Snowman showed up at the workshop, he was wearing a funny fake beard, a fuzzy red Santa hat, and even carrying his very own magic sack!

“We’ve been best friends for years,” Frosty said. “Don’t you worry for one second Nick. I won’t let you down. Those kids will get their presents!”

Santa thanked his snowman friend and quickly fell back asleep.

Frosty went out to the stables, found Rudolph, and said, “Just between you and me, I have no idea what I’m doing. You’ll help me out, right?”

Rudolph smiled, his red nose glowed, and he said, “We’ll make it work together.” And they took off! Flying through the night sky!

Frosty shimmied down fireplaces, filled stockings, left gifts, ate cookies and made it through to every home on the world!

It was very scary for the snowman, but sometimes we have to be brave when our friends need us. And if we can be very brave we can do anything!

[][] So it Begins

Did you ever wonder how it all started? How Santa Clause came to be? Why he does what he does every year?

Long long ago, before he moved to the North Pole and set up his famous workshop, before Santa was even called Santa at all he was known throughout his village in Patara, a city of Lycia, in Asia Minor simply as Nicholas. An extremely kind and generous man, he was known to leave gifts for children and the needy while they slept. He always gave his presents away at night because he did not want thanks, he did not want people to feel like they owed a debt, he just wanted to give to give. To help people as often and as well as he could.

One day Nicholas heard a story that made him very sad. A single father raising three daughters was struggling to make ends meet. Worst of all, at that time, the daughters would not be able to marry good men because they were too poor, so they would be very lonely all of their lives.

“Hmmm” Nicolas thought to himself. “It seems all of their problems could be solved if only they had more money.”

So Nick did what he always did when he saw someone he could help. He waited until nightfall and he tried to sneak into the house where he man and his three lovely daughters were sleeping. But the doors were all locked! Nick couldn’t fault them for that, locking your doors at night is just good safety sense. But he also couldn’t let that stop him from helping these people.

So the man who would come to be known as Santa climbed the side of the stone house. Hand over hand, holding his bag in his teeth, he pulled himself up to the roof. He had hoped to find a skylight or something, but he had no such luck. The only entrance he could find was the chimney!

Looking down the chimney Nicholas thought to himself, “I can fit in there, right?” And his brain replied, “Ummm. Maybe?”

Brimming with confidence, Santa climbed inside the chimney and shimmied his way down, very grateful that no one had set a fire that night.

A few feet above the ground Nick lost his footing, slipped and fell down onto the logs with a THUD.

“I’m glad I’m carrying my own seat cushion,” Nick thought to himself, never more grateful that his belly shook like a bowl full of jelly.

Now inside Santa looked around for the perfect place to leave his gifts. And there, hanging by the fire to dry, he saw the daughter’s freshly laundered socks.

Saint Nick smiled. That seemed, to him, to be the perfect place. So he filled the stockings full with gold coins!

Then, with a little more effort than it took to come down, Nicolas worked his way back up the chimney and back out into the night.

When the man and his daughters awoke the next morning they couldn’t believe their eyes! Someone had blessed them with enough money to create a better life. And they all lived happily ever after.

And, of course, that was not the last time Saint Nick would sneak into a home and leave presents. As we all know, Santa Clause was just getting started.

~ ~ ~

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[][][] Funny Christmas Jokes

Q: Why is it so cold at Christmas?

A: Because it’s in Decembrrr!

Q: Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money?

A: In the snowbank!

Q: What’s Scrooge’s favorite Christmas game?

A: Mean-opoly!

Q: What is red then white and red then white?

A: Santa rolling down a snowy hill!

Q: Who delivers cat Christmas presents?

A: Santa Claws!

Q: What does Santa call that reindeer with no eyes?

A: No-eyed-deer!

Q: Which reindeer has the worst manners?

A: Rude-olph!

Q: How does Santa Claus take pictures?

A: With his North Pole-aroid!

Q: What’s Tarzan’s favorite Christmas song?

A: Jungle bells!

Q: What can Santa give away and still keep?

A: A cold!

Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?

A: Snowflakes!

Q: Why is a cat on a beach like Christmas?

A: Because they both have sandy claws!

Q: Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas?

A: Santa Jaws!

Q: Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the Christmas Party?

A: He had no body to go with!

Q: When is a good time for Santa to visit?

A: Anytime!

Q: What’s Santa called when he takes a rest while delivering presents?

A: Santa Pause!

Q: What do snowmen like most about going to school?

A: Snow and tell!

Q: Why does Santa go down the chimney?

A: Because it soots him!

Q: What do you call a singing elf?

A: A wrapper!

Q: Who is never hungry at Christmas?

A: The turkey because he’s always stuffed!

Q: What is the cow’s holiday greeting?

A: Mooory Christmas!

Q: How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?

A: Fleece Navidad!

Q: What’s fat and jolly and runs on eight wheels?

A: Santa on roller skates!

Q: Which one of Santa’s reindeer is the cleanest?

A: Comet!

Q: What’s the best thing to put in a Christmas cookie?

A: Your teeth!

Q: What did the ocean say to Santa?

A: Nothing. It just waved!

Q: What nationality is Santa Claus?

A: North Polish!

Knock knock!

Who’s there?


Donut who?

Donut open til Christmas!

Knock knock!

Who’s there?


Mary who?

Mary Christmas!

Knock knock!

Who’s there?


Abby who?

Merry Christmas and Abby New Year!

[][] About the Author

Arnie Lightning is a dreamer. He believes that everyone should dream big and not be afraid to take chances to make their dreams come true. Arnie enjoys writing, reading, doodling, and traveling. In his free time, he likes to play video games and run. Arnie lives in Mississippi where he graduated from The University of Southern Mississippi in Hattiesburg, MS.

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Santa Claus Adventures

Christmas Stories, Jokes, and Activities! Every year around this time, Santa and his elves are hard at work. They are preparing for the most magical time of year, Christmas! We all know that Santa delivers us presents, but what you don't hear much about is his adventures. Find out more in the book! -3500+ words -Funny Christmas jokes -5 Christmas stories for kids -Santa Claus puzzles and mazes -Excellent for early and beginner readers This book is fantastic for reading aloud at home, bedtime stories, and sharing with friends and family! Fun for the entire family Kids can practice their reading skills and share the funny jokes with friends and family. This book is sure to put everyone in the holiday spirit! You can share these fun Christmas stories over and over again. Arnie Lightning is a children's book author with a straightforward goal. He wants his work to create a positive impact in the lives of others through children's books. Learning morals, lessons, and good character can start at a young age. Arnie's books reflect this. By providing a comfortable and entertaining environment, learning can be a fun activity!

  • Author: Hey Sup Bye Publishing
  • Published: 2017-08-15 16:32:18
  • Words: 3519
Santa Claus Adventures Santa Claus Adventures