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Night Time Science Issue #7

p.

Issue #7

night

time

s c i e n c e

My name is Charles Fitzhugh Bewer. I was born on 03/16/95 in Portland Oregon but was raised in Beaver-ton Oregon. At three years old I was swept away by a river of blood. My Good Neighbor was Bill Maplewood.

Beaverton

Fashion

Week

Charlie’s Top 5

Fav Companies

1. Nike

[]2. Columbia Sportswear

[][*3. Burgerville *]

[]4. Intel

[]5. Tillamook Cheese

Beaverton

Fashion

Week

You see the abandoned Nike warehouse on Millikan and Murray standing alone surrounded by a fluorescent mist as the white moon glazes over its sharp metal structure in this dark night. A muffled hum can be heard from within the ware-house, as you get closer the muffled hum intensely transforms into a screeching 1980’s heavy metal guitar solo. The in-side feels damp. As you follow the music you enter a hallway which leads you to a brightly lit room. You see twelve people in black cloaks standing in a circle sur-rounding a pile of computers and shoes. The heavy Metal blasts as you attempt to understand what is happening. You watch as all twelve figures simultaneously drop what appears to be zippo lighters onto the pile of computers and shoes. The fire explodes into a magnificent rage, the twelve figures begin running back and forth around the fire, the music fades out, to be replaced by a simplistic drum beat.

The Federal Department of Friendly Neighbors was established in 1994 by presi-dent Bill Clinton, a lifelong Friendly Neighbor himself. After witnessing the first ever televised Beaverton Blood Flood, the FDFN was created to return children and small animals to their homes after a Blood Flood. Other celebrity FDFN agents include: Tom Hanks, Ron Paul, Michael Douglas, Phil Knight, and Bill Gates.

The elders walk around sniping ciga-rette butts on the street corners and the alleys in between our various fast food establishments. The corner stores sell our elders 40oz bottles of grain al-cohol. The elders teach our young in the confines of bus stop enclosures and oc-casionally in line at our many Starbucks.

“Where does this blood come from? If what the el-ders say is true then where does it actually come from? I remember as a child my lit-tle brother was carried down our street by it. I told him not to get too close but he’s never listened to anything I’ve ever had to say. I remember the look on his face as he realized what was happening. An expres-sion of the experience of a true reality. I haven’t talk-ed to my brother in years. He’s still working at the old folks home, finally got promoted to head chef. We’re all proud of him.”

Beaverton

Fashion

Week

Dog parks are a great place to meet fellow dog lovers and a fantastic setting for you to voice your political/religious views.

Beaverton

Fashion

Week

Beaverton

Fashion

Week

[*WORK FROM HOME. MAKE LOTS OF CASH QUICK USING ADVANCED SOCIAL MEDIA MARKET-ING TECHNIQUES THAT WE DEVELOPED. JOIN OUR PROGRAM TODAY AND LEARN THE CRAFT OF INFLUENCING THOSE CLOSEST TO YOU INTO HELPING OUR ORGANIZATION THRIVE. *]

COLLEGE IS A SCAM, ALL HIGHER LEARN-ING ORGANIZATIONS WERE CREATED TO TAKE MONEY FROM YOU AND THOSE CLOSE TO YOU. SIGN UP TODAY AND BEGIN YOUR NEW LIFE OF SUCCESS AND CRIPPLING SOCIAL-ECO-NOMIC ANXIETY. TRY OUR VITAMINS TO BET-TER UNDERSTAND OUR PRODUCT. USE STUDENT LOANS TO CLIMB OUR ECONOMIC LADDER TO SUCCESS AND INTERNAL FULFILMENT.

You shouldn’t go in there. If security finds you they’ll beat you to a pulp. They have a whole building on the campus for it. They call it “Phil’s playpen” because back in the late 90’s Phil had a habit of hiring old alcohol-ics and beating them merci-lessly just after company meet-ings. He used to do it right in the boardroom in front of every-one. Nowadays they just broadcast the beatings on flat screens in the

cafeteria.

Beaverton

Fashion

Week

Intel had a similar department; although the program only lasted a month due to a lack of interest from the employees. As it turned out, they were more motivated by emotional abuse. As a result most of Intel’s campus tv’s and break rooms stream footage of family court hearings and police bodycam record-ings from domestic disputes.

Dr. Bowmen: “So wait, is the blood a metaphor for the effect of big business in Beaverton?

Charlie: “I wouldn’t really go that far, I’d say it’s more about the internal level of effects of them in our subcon-scious. Local government too, I’ll add.”

Dr. Bowmen: “What does that mean exactly?”

Charlie: “I feel like they have a very interesting effect on our everyday lives and how we process our emotions. The way our police look and act and the things we think about when we drive past the Nike or Intel campuses. It’s like the peasants looking up at the castle on the hill. When you walk around Beaverton’s local government buildings or big international companies you get a sense that these people aren’t apart of us, that they are some-how bigger than us. Or at least that’s how I feel.”

Dr. Bowmen: “Who are the elders?”

Charlie: “I really like the idea of a time when the secrets of our universe were held by a select few, due to the Internet I feel as though we will never get back to that point, nor should we. I think we’ve reached a point where the lore of decades past are inane, so the elderly have no purpose in our present existence. That conflict seems very important to me for some reason but I don’t really know why.”

Dr. Bowmen: “Hmm. So how have the new medications been working?”

I think I might sign up for the FDFN but im kinda on the fence. Like idk if it will be worth it, with everything on the news about it nowadays and all. Idk… My dad and grandpa have been in it since it started and they are still very into it. I just need a sense of structure in my life and I think becoming a Friendly Neighbor would be the only way to like actually do it.

All i’ve ever wanted was the new pair of high top Jordans and a jet black Tesla and a decent VR headset and a new vape and that’s it. I don’t ask for much… I’m a nice guy, ok? I help my friends out when they can’t pay for lunch. I always help out the less fortunate in every possible way I can.

My dream job is to be the main idea guy at Nike or Intel. Like, I just want to be able to boss around thousands of people. I want to be able to be like: “Yeah that shirt should be red!” or like: “No, not that kind of red. Get out you’re fired.”

Beaverton

Fashion

Week

Thanks for check-ing out my fashion issue. It really means a lot to me that you read it all the way from cover to cov-er, or maybe you just started read-ing the back, in which case you can con-tinue reading

Submit to us

nighttimescience.com

this zine in re-verse and hopefully it will create a new experi-ence that I hadnt even planned on creat-ing.

Anywho, what did you think? My personal email is [email protected] and I sure would greatly apreciate hearing from you.


Night Time Science Issue #7

  • ISBN: 9781370199679
  • Author: Night Time Science
  • Published: 2016-09-23 20:06:23
  • Words: 1267
Night Time Science Issue #7 Night Time Science Issue #7