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How to cope with Stress and Depression

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How to cope with Stress and Depression

 

Sharing my own Personal Experience

 

About Me

 

My name is Raj Karki, I am from Nepal. I am a great enthusiast about Personal Development and Getting Better in Life. I think a lot and I am trying to find the meaning of life, for me life is a journey of self discovery.

I have been trying to improve my life since my early teen years, this desire to improving the life got further boosted by my first Mobile Nokia X3 which I got at the age of 15, I used that mobile to search for various Personal Development articles all over the internet. In the process I wrote my First Book Teenage Guidance at the age of 16 during three months holiday of school, with the aim of helping and guiding other teenagers like me esp. of my country.

Since last half decades, my life has been like a Guinea Pig, I have been trying various methods and tricks to improve my life, I have failed a lot, injured myself a lot during the process of Personal Improvement but in last 6 months I have hit the Jack Pot, I have made a tremendous progress and I want to share it.

I still remember when I used to be 15 years old, I used to search all over the Google for various tips, tricks and habits to improve my life. I tried various tips and methods, but they weren’t stable, I failed a lot. So, I want to help all those 15 years old who are searching for the way to improve their life. I want to share what I have learnt in my life.

Moreover, I want to share whatever I have learnt at a free of cost. Right now I don’t have any plan to monetize my site. But if you can, then you can Donate Me, I mean I still need money to live my life by doing this. But even if I don’t make money, I will keep on doing this as long as I can.

 

 

This book is One of Three Part Book, this book is actually Part 3rd.

 

My other book includes:

 

Ideal Morning Routine

 

Exercising for 180 Days

 

My Own Story:

 

I want to start this book with my own story, so that I can somehow relate to your pain and trouble. I had a difficult upbringing. My father was an abusive person, he didn’t cared about me and my Mom. Since, my birth there was a lot of quarrelling between my parents, he was a violent selfish person, moreover we were poor at that time, living in rent in Kathmandu, Capital of Nepal. In my early age, Mom used to buy the cheapest rice available in market and she used to cook everything in a same pot (it’s called Khichadi) to save money as sometimes there used to no food. Things were worse during my early age, my Mom had to struggle a lot to keep us both alive, she worked as Tea Sales Person roaming around the city, by packing the Tea Grains herself. So, my early days were spent in very bad environment watching the fighting of parents, I had to be my own friend, playing with myself. My father used to change the rent room every 2-3 months, so sometimes school used to be very very far.

At the age of 5/6 years old, Mom sent me to her parents house and she went to Hong Kong to work as maid. After Hong Kong she went to Israel. She is still in Israel. Moreover she has divorced him and my father has married another woman. So, my life wasn’t normal, I was left to grow on my own. I had to be my own guide, be my own parents and solve almost my all problems by myself. Still, I love to be alone, I don’t feel lonely, I just enjoy my own company.

Throughout the teen years, I had very low self esteem. I couldn’t talk properly because of my stuttering. People said I was silent but I was silent not because of shyness (may be it was also) but because I was unable to speak properly. I wasn’t asking any questions in class because I was afraid and I couldn’t speak and even if I speak, teacher used to have hard time to understand me. So, I had to taught myself to study, I had to understand things on my own by looking at examples if I didn’t knew it. Moreover a science teacher in my school nicknamed me “Silent Hero” because my marks were good but I was the most silent and lonely kid in class, I guess he didn’t expected good marks from me. Moreover, I have lived all my life in Maternal Grand-Parents house, I have found that it will not be same as your own house, as your own family, you have to be afraid of doing anything, that fear always exist and one of the main thing is you will lack the emotional supports of your real parents. It will not feel the same, you will always feel you don’t belong here, even the small words and actions hurt and you start thinking if everything was right, if my parents were here, things would have been different. But anyway I was free to do anything, the main thing I lacked was emotional supports.

 

Well, I can go on talking about my life, but I don’t think you are here to listen to my story.

 

Moreover, yeah I was depressive, shy, low self esteemed kid. I still am, but I have improved a lot and understood a lot. I am not social, still I don’t talk much, part of the reason is I am still stutterer so I have little difficult to speak fluently and moreover people feel little hard to understand me. I am not a Out-Going Person but I have discovered my Life Purpose and I am trying to live it. I used my weakness to my greatest strength. I used my introvert characters to read book, improve upon myself and now I am trying to help other to improve their life.

 

So, if you think you are alone, then you are wrong. There are 1000s of people like you, like me, who are in far more worse conditions. In this book, I want to share, how I am coping with things, how I have managed to adapt with life.

 

You see, Pain and Trouble in life is relative, some are worrying about how to earn money to buy food whereas some are worrying about how to earn more money to buy a Private Jet. Some are worrying about how to Pass in exam whereas some are worried about how to get top in exam. So, you might have faced worse conditions than me but still the pain will be same, moreover you will be stronger than me because

“What don’t Kills you, Makes you Stronger.”

 

 

Why do we get Depressed?

 

Well, there are various things that make us depressed like bad childhood experience, some kind of trauma or horrifying experience. But I believe there is a way we can control it or reduce it. For e.g. we can reduce our hunger by eating food, we can reduce our pain by applying various kinds of healing medications. So, according to my own experience we can heal and reduce our stress and depression by changing the way we do things and the way we think.

Well, I am not the expert in depression, it’s just I have learnt from my own experience and researches, so takes this book as just simple guide not as a Expert’s Manual.

 

 

Here I want to share some of the things that worked for me:

 

1. Start exercising: Exercising is a very good way to relieve stress and depression. It will increase your will power and releases hormones and chemicals that makes you feel good and also improves sleep. Regular exercising helps to release endorphin, a chemical similar to morphine which reduces stress and produces euphoric feelings. But unlike morphine, endorphin don’t lead to addiction or dependence. It also produces Serotonin which helps to reduce depression and improves mood. Exercising even helps to improve self esteem, makes you feel good about yourself. You can read my exercise ritual with photo Here:

 

2. Start Meditating: As exercising is focused on physical body, meditation is focused on mental health. It helps to get control over unnecessary thinking and you starts to notice your emotions and anger in a lot different way. By the way, you don’t need to be a monk to start meditation, you just need to focus on your breathing. No one is perfect esp. in the beginning. So don’t try to be perfect, just do what you can.

 

3. Focus in breathing: I remember about a year ago, I had to travel around +5-6 (50 + 50 KM) hours in Bus and walk +5-6 KM in scorching sun everyday to construct (look after the construction of) my house, I was really frustrated, depressed and things weren’t going good, I was really tired, I just wanted to die. The pain and stress was so much, I started focusing in my breathing, I started counting them, I counted them till 100 and again started from 0. I started doing this throughout the travel and when I used to feel bad. This helped me to stop thinking about negative and depressing thoughts.

Whenever you start to think too much, start to focus on your breathing. Just realize breathing is the greatest thing in life. You are alive because you are breathing. Just try to be in this moment. Remember past is just the memory, future is just the imagination that exist inside your head, there is only now.

 

4. Be Grateful for What you Have: Don’t worry too much about what you don’t have, just enjoy everything you have. You might have wonderful bed to sleep in, food to eat, air to breathe, water to drink, family or pet to love. Many time we cause ourselves stressed because we get so obsessive on things we don’t have, we try to run after it and when things don’t become as we expect then we start getting depressed and feel sad.

Moreover make a list of things that you are grateful for, then paste it in your room, read it daily or write it down daily or do all of them.

(I write this every day, after my autosuggestion in the evening. This helps me to remind me what are the things I am grateful for.)

 

5. Journal: In past I used to journal all my thoughts and my pain in my diary, this had helped me to get rid of all those bad things. It helped me to express my thoughts and all my pain. It was a relief, it felt like I was sharing my story, my problems to my friend.

But nowadays I don’t journal. Currently I am trying to share my achievements and progress in my blog rajkarki.com so that I can help other. But I am thinking to start it again someday. You can read my depression phase [+ Here:+]

 

6. This can be your Last Day: Life is full of uncertainity and risks, this really can be the last day of your life.

So, how do you want to live the last day of your life. Does all those worry and pain worth to remember and to think about. When you die all your pain, fear, anxiety, problems don’t matter much, all those unimportant things which you are worrying about don’t matter much.

Since couple of months, everyday I have been making list of three important things that I need to do If today is the Last Day of my Life. This gives me sense of all the important things in my life. You can read my related post [+ Here:+]

 

7. Find the Purpose of Life: Well, all people won’t have the huge Purpose like Mother Teresa, Dalai Lama, it can be as small as taking care of dog, taking care of your family, it’s something that makes you alive. Just be yourself and listen to yourself and you will discover it. Life is like a onion, you have to peel one layer at time and one day you will discover your true self. Till then keep questioning yourself. Why are you alive? What makes you tick, what drives you, what do you want to do in life? And go after it. In the beginning my Life Purpose was something like this, it was when I was 16 years old, my plan was to become Civil Engineer and develop my nation. But things have changed a lot and I have discovered a lot of things. You can read my way struggle to find purpose [+ Here:]. I have also shared my answer in [ Quora+].

 

8. Have a Goal: Have a mission in life. Don’t waste your mind power and time to think about what you don’t want. Just focus on the things you want and go for it. Having a goal gives you extra boost to accomplish what you want in life. Once you accomplish it, you will start to feel good about yourself and hence things will get better.

 

(This is my Daily Planning, back then and Now. For more image and information: Click Here.)

 

Summary:

 

 

This book is One of Three Part Book, this book is actually Part 3rd.

 

My other book includes:

 

Ideal Morning Routine

 

Exercising for 180 Days

 

 

 

This Book is based on my personal experience, so your result might not be the same as mine. Moreover, this book is for educational purpose and I am not liable for any wrongdoing or any damage caused by this book.

 

 

 


How to cope with Stress and Depression

I want to start this book with my own story, so that I can somehow relate to your pain and trouble. I had a difficult upbringing. My father was an abusive person, he didn’t cared about me and my Mom. Since, my birth there was a lot of quarrelling between my parents, he was a violent selfish person, moreover we were poor at that time, living in rent in Kathmandu, Capital of Nepal. In my early age, Mom used to buy the cheapest rice available in market and she used to cook everything in a same pot (it’s called Khichadi) to save money as sometimes there used to no food. Things were worse during my early age, my Mom had to struggle a lot to keep us both alive, she worked as Tea Sales Person roaming around the city, by packing the Tea Grains herself. So, my early days were spent in very bad environment watching the fighting of parents, I had to be my own friend, playing with myself. My father used to change the rent room every 2-3 months, so sometimes school used to be very very far. At the age of 5/6 years old, Mom sent me to her parents house and she went to Hong Kong to work as maid. After Hong Kong she went to Israel. She is still in Israel. So, if you think you are alone, then you are wrong. There are 1000s of people like you, like me, who are in far more worse conditions. In this book, I want to share, how I am coping with things, how I have managed to adapt with life. You see, Pain and Trouble in life is relative, some are worrying about how to earn money to buy food whereas some are worrying about how to earn more money to buy a Private Jet. Some are worrying about how to Pass in exam whereas some are worried about how to get top in exam. So, you might have faced worse conditions than me but still the pain will be same, moreover you will be stronger than me because “What don’t Kills you, Makes you Stronger.”

  • Author: Raj Karki
  • Published: 2017-04-25 11:20:10
  • Words: 2311
How to cope with Stress and Depression How to cope with Stress and Depression