Copyright © 2015 by Alan Johnstone and Ierma Burger.
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No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the author. The only exception is by a reviewer, who may quote short excerpts in a review.
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Table of Contents
About the audio file
Theory: Falling asleep.
Bonny teaches Corry how to fall asleep.
*Ierma Burger *
I met Alan about two years before this book was conceptualized. Alan helped me through my own life issues.
I always had a passion for children and through our work together it became clear that I wanted to help children that also had issues to work through. To help me to fulfill my inner drive to help children, Alan suggested that I write children stories with him as mentor. When children learn positive perceptions and obtain the skills to handle issues, at a young age, they have it much easier handling issues later in life.
*Alan Johnstone *
Much has been said about emotional quotient (EQ) and most parents have come to realise how important it is to recognise the need to assist their child’s emotional development. It is simply not enough to trust our natural parenting instincts.
How do you develop the EQ of a young child or toddler? Children learn through stories and easily associate with the characters in stories. This natural tendency provides a parent a wonderful opportunity to guide his or her child’s behaviour and feelings and teach them understandings with which to improve their EQ.
In these books different problem behaviours are used to depict techniques and skills that children can use to help themselves change their behaviour and feelings. The stories in these books have been developed to help a child help him or herself. Along with the stories are technical notes that assist parents and educators with a deeper understanding of the technical aspects behind this type of story telling. This has been done so that the parents may tell stories of their own making to help their children with their own unique set of problems.
I suggest that a parent reads the stories to the child a few times before allowing the child to make use of the Cd. The Cd can be seen as a tool that will help the child, consciously, and subconsciously absorb the lessons within the stories. You may find that you child comes to deeply love the stories!
These books and audios are not only meant for children who have developed the problem behaviours depicted but are also meant to give all children new skills and understandings.
This work augments a skills workshop which gives parents and educators the skills they need to help their children.
Professionally recorded story for you child:
For your child to benefit from this work it is important that your child can listen to it repeatedly. You may want to read it often, over and over, but this may become laborious. Therefore I have made a recording of the story for your child.
This helps your child to subconsciously learn through repetition. It is an easy way for a child to learn, especially when it’s fun. Also it saves you from having to read this bedtime story every night yourself. I suggest you read it perhaps once to your child and then play the audio in the future, when your child goes to bed.
If you are aiming to learn to tell therapeutic stories of this nature, the audio file will assist you in recognising where emphasis, pausing and changes in tonality are used to highlight suggestion to the child’s subconscious mind.
The audio file is available here:
Click on the link below to find out how.
A child who avoids sleep, as a primary or secondary gain, also then has the control of avoiding sleep. This story has been developed to offer the child the control over sleep instead. As adults we often neglect to recognise that a child has his or her own mind and will. Children can become very obstinate when they perceive they are not being offered choice.
It’s also important to realise that many causes for bad sleeping patterns are a result of mental and physical conditioning. If the child is used to going to sleep in your arms while drinking a bottle and you patting his or her back you are conditioning your child to fall asleep in this manner. If your child were to wake up at night you should not be surprised if your child would need to fall asleep in your arms while drinking a bottle and you patting his or her back.
The lesson to take from this is that, as a parent, you need to be cognisant of the associations your child develops with regards to sleep. It is also important that you encourage you child’s own self soothing. Your child will wake up at night. It’s normal for a child to wake up four or five times at night, and when they do, they need to be able to go back to sleep on their own.
The idea of beginning to dream and then falling asleep versus falling asleep and then beginning to dream is a linguistic bind that presupposes sleep and offers a number of benefits. Firstly, recognise that the child has no knowledge with regard as to whether dreaming before going to sleep is possible or not. Presupposing to the child that this is so, is enough to make it so for the childlike subconscious mind.
When a child begins to vividly imagine that which he or she wants, he or she enters into a dream like state. The child also gets to choose what he or she wishes to focus on when falling asleep rather than being forced into something or having negative invading thoughts retard the sleep process.
Finally, relaxing the body allows the child to move toward sleep. As the child focuses on what’s happening in his or her imagination his or her awareness shifts from what’s happening outside the self to what’s happening inside the imagination. This disassociation from consciousness assists greatly in having the child fall asleep.
Side Note: In the technical notes of the first story, “Corry the monkey is done sucking his thumb.” much emphasis is placed on showing the parent/educator how descriptive language can be used to engage the child’s imagination. In the second story, “Timmy the kitten’s bed stays dry”, more emphasis is placed on the understanding of how suggestion can be utilised. The notes in this story continue to provide insight into the use of suggestion. You can become a force for good in your child’s life by understanding and practicing these skills
– Alan Johnstone
The little animals really enjoyed building the tree house on the thick branches of the big old tree. Today they built the floor and walls. They also put little windows in the walls.
The tree house is high in the tree and when you look out of the windows you can see the mountains.
The mountains are so far away that they look blue. Sometimes when it rains a beautiful rainbow forms over the mountains. The rainbow has many colours.
The lowest part of the rainbow is purple, then blue, then green, then yellow, then orange and then red at the top. Today it rained at the mountains and once the little animals had finished building for the day they all gathered around the tree house’s little windows to look at the wonderful rainbow.
“I wish I could go to the blue mountains.” Said Corry, “It seems so calm and peaceful there.” (Implying it is safe and peaceful.) Bonny the bunny looks at Corry. He looks really tired. His little eyes have dark rings under them. His ears are all droopy and even his tail just drags on the ground. (Describing the result of a problem state.)
The little animals are sleeping over at Corry’s house again tonight so that they can continue building the tree house tomorrow. They are all quite hungry but before they can have supper they must first have a bath. (Describing the pattern of events leading to bedtime.) Corry’s mommy gives each of the little animals a towel and a piece of soap so that they can go bath in the river. It’s lots of fun! The little animals put their towels down on the bank of the river then they hold on to their soap and run and jump into the water. The water is a little cold so they wash quickly from head to toe. They then rinse the soap off and climb out of the water quickly so they can dry themselves. Now they are clean and very, very hungry. (Associating having bathed and being clean with an appetite.)
When they got back to Corry’s house his mommy had already dished up food for each little animal. They eat and really enjoy their food. When their tummies are full they are so tired! [_(Associating having eaten supper with becoming tired.) _]
It’s hard work building a tree house and they all want to sleep now. [_(Associating the activities of the day with becoming tired.) _]
Before they go to bed they first swing to the toilet. The little girl animals swing on pink ropes and the little boy animals swing on blue ropes. (Strengthening the suggestions offered in the previous story.)
After the little animals have all been to the toilet they climbed onto the big jumping castle bed with their pillows and blankets and made themselves ready for sleep. In no time at all nearly all the little animals are sleeping.
Corry is very tired but he can’t sleep! (Mentioning a problem state of being tired but not being able to sleep.) He thinks about the tree house and he thinks about his friends and he thinks about his family and just about everything that worries him. (Offering the reason of negative invasive thoughts as a reason for not being able to sleep.)
He knows he must sleep because sleep is very good for you. While you sleep you grow bigger and bigger. While you sleep you get well if you are sick and when you have a good night’s sleep you have much more fun the next day! [_(Describing the benefits of a healthy sleep pattern. Using Corry’s words to himself as direct suggestion for the listener.) _]
Bonny can see that Corry doesn’t know how to fall asleep easily yet. (Implying there is an easy way.) Today she could see that Corry was tired and that he didn’t have so much fun. (Recognising the loss of a benefit due to the problem state.)
She has stayed awake so she can show Corry her special way of falling asleep. “Corry can’t you sleep?” asked Bonny softly.
“Oh Bonny! I struggle every night to go to sleep.” Said Corry.
“I think about so many things that worry me and then I can’t fall asleep.
Sometimes I don’t even feel tired. (Describing various reasons for the problem state.) _] But I know I must sleep because sleep is very good for you and you have much more fun the next day if you have a good night’s sleep.” [_(Compounding on the suggestion for the benefits of a good sleeping pattern.) “Corry,” Said Bonny.
“I have a special way of going to sleep. It works very well and if you do it every night you will be able to fall asleep quicker and quicker and you will enjoy your sleep more and more! (Presupposing that each time the method is practiced a greater success is achieved.)
“I can show you how if you want.” (Offering a solution and allowing the child to choose to accept it gives the child control of the process. The implication of the child accepting is that the child agrees to the process.)
“Bonny if you show me how I will do it every night because I want to grow bigger and bigger and I want to feel good and have more fun! Will you please show me how?” (Acceptance of the responsibility of applying the solution while compounding the suggestions with regards to the benefits of a healthy sleeping pattern.)
“Corry I will show you right now” said Bonny. Then Bonny said “Corry normally you first fall asleep and then begin to dream. Did you know that you can begin to dream first and then fall asleep?” Bonny asked. (A linguistic bind presupposing sleep. Whether you sleep and then dream or dream and then sleep, sleep occurs.)
“Can you really?” asked Corry.
“Yes and you can even choose your own dream!” (Tag statement moves the listener’s conscious mind away from the linguistic bind.) said Bonny.
“How do you do that?” Asked Corry.
“Let’s practice that.” said Bonny. “Begin by closing your eyes and letting them rest. Now tell your eyes to go to sleep. When you feel your eyes are sleeping you can try open them but you will feel they won’t want to.”
(Presupposing that by telling the eyes to go to sleep they will and won’t want to open. The word “try”[_ is used as it denotes failure subconsciously. Trying is not succeeding. Once the child “][_tries”][_ to open his or her eyes and finds he or she cannot the child becomes more accepting of further suggestion.)_]
Corry closed his eyes and said “Sleep eyes!” His eyes relaxed just as they do when he sleeps at night. Then Corry tried to open them but they were so comfortable and relaxed that they didn’t want to. (Response to suggestion compounds suggestion.)
“Bonny my eyes are sleeping now and they don’t want to open.” said Corry. (Confirmation of response to suggestion. Compounds suggestion.)
“Good Corry!” said Bonny. “Now think about your feet and your legs: tell them to also relax and go to sleep. They know how to fall asleep and will become nice and warm as they fall asleep. When you are sure they are asleep you will feel that they are so relaxed and warm they don’t want to move.” (This suggestion is strengthened by the success of the child’s conviction of already succeeded with relaxing the eyes.)
Then Corry said, “Sleep feet and legs!” Corry can feel how his feet and legs are becoming calm and warm. (Response to suggestion.)
They are so relaxed they are even beginning to feel a little heavier. “Are your feet and legs sleeping yet Corry?” asked Bonny.
“Yes Bonny they are nice and warm and heavy and they are so relaxed they just don’t want to move.” Said Corry. [_(Confirmation of response to suggestion. Compounds suggestion.) _]
“Now just like your eyes, feet and legs relaxed and went to sleep just let your whole body go to sleep. Your arms and body will become heavy and nice and warm.
(This suggestion is strengthened by the success of the child’s conviction of already succeeded with eye closure and the relaxation of the feet and legs.)
You can still stay awake for a while your body sleeps so you can get to choose your own dream!” Said Bonny.
(Suggesting that the child has control of being physically asleep yet mentally awake and that this can occur for a short period of time.)
Then Bonny said “Your eyes are sleeping now and your body is sleeping now and you can begin to dream about anything that is nice for you. [_(Confirming the state and implying that the child can therefore choose to dream what they want. This deepens the child’s feeling of control.) _]
Every night you can choose to dream something different. Anything that makes you feel good, anything that makes you feel stronger, and anything that lets you sleep well. Your bed can fly and take you anywhere in your dream. Anywhere you want to go. [_(Continuing to offer control to the child in the form of choices.) _]
You can go to the beach and build sand castles in the sand and feel the cool sea water washing over your feet.
You can have a birthday party with all your friends and play any game you want to in your dream.
Your bed can take you to the stars like a rocket ship and you can walk on the moon and do anything that is safe for you to do.
You can even laugh with the funniest pixies when they tickle you and dance with the most beautiful fairies then have a tea party and look at their beautiful wings.
You can dream anything you want.” (Giving some concrete examples of choices.)
Corry chooses his dream. He wants to dream about the Blue Mountains.[_ (Showing how Corry exercises his choice and control.) _]
He tells himself, “You are lying safely in your bed. Your eyes are sleeping and your body is sleeping and you are now choosing a dream. You can dream anything that is good and calming for you. You can choose anything because you are now the boss of your own dreams.
Your bed lifts you up and flies you to where you want to go. You are safe and comfortable. You see what you can see, you hear what you can hear and you feel how wonderful you can feel.
You understand now! When things worry you that happened in the day you can have a wonderful dream at night that makes you feel better.
When you dream you wonderful dream you can sleep deep, deep, deeply. When you wake up during the night you can remember your wonderful dream and begin to dream it again as you sleep deep, deep, deeply.
Your bed can take you where you want and you can do whatever is good and fun for you while you sleep.” [_(Offering direct suggestion to the listener in the guise of Corry speaking to himself.) _]
Corry begins to dream about the Blue Mountains. He dreams how his bed takes him to the Blue Mountains while he sleeps more and more deeply. [_(Implying that sleep and sleeping deeply is related to his dreaming (imagining.) _]
He flies with his bed and feels the warm night air on his cheeks.
He flies closer and closer and can begin to see the trees on the Blue Mountains. His bed lands softly and Corry the monkey gets off. Around him are so many monkeys to play with! The little monkeys are swinging through the trees from branch to branch and Corry goes to play with them in the trees of the Blue Mountains. (Offering an example of how to “dream”.)
Bonny the bunny can see that Corry is enjoying his sleep. He is smiling while he sleeps! (Implying that this is a pleasurable experience.)
She goes and climbs in under her own blanket and closes her eyes and tells them to go to sleep. Then she tells her body to quickly go to sleep. (Implying that this can be achieved faster.) She begins to dream her own favourite dream of hop, hop, hopping and playing with the fairies in the big garden while she sleeps deep, deep, and deeper.
(Implying that sleep and sleeping deeply is related to his imagining.)
Now dream your own wonderful dream. Let your bed take you where you want to go while you listen to the music.
Sleep deeply and when your eyes open in the morning you feel so good about yourself.
Every morning you are older, stronger and more clever and your day is fun.
Every morning you are older, stronger, and more clever and you feel good about yourself. (Offering beneficial direct suggestions to the listener as he or she drifts deeper into sleep.)
This story is the fourth of a set of books that offer skills to parents with young children. Audio files of these stories are available for download so that your child can listen to the story enough to internalise the concepts offered. Please check my blog for more details or if you wish to contact me.
Click on the link below to find out how.
[*These ebooks are available: *]
(A book that offers advanced communication skills with regard to getting children to obey and comply in a positive manner. The four stories in this series of books are examples where the skills in this book have been used.)
. (Helping children overcome thumb sucking.)
. (Helping children overcome bed wetting.)
. (Teaches children a technique to enjoy falling asleep.)
. (Helps children cope when parents are in conflict.)
This unique story offers children a method that they can learn to easily fall asleep and enjoy the process of going to sleep. Children learn through stories and easily associate with the characters in stories. This natural tendency provides a parent a wonderful opportunity to guide his or her child’s behaviour and feelings and teach them understandings with which to improve their EQ. In the ebook, notes are provided which offer parents, educators and play therapists the valuable skills of story telling. The notes are interspersed in the story and explain why certain words and ideas are offered in the story. Each book in this series (Smart Stories) adds to this skill set.