A lonely journey
By Alexander V
Copyright 2017 by Alexander V
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A lonely journey
Out there I was, walking the lonely path I had chosen for myself. It was just another night, I always walked during the night, I enjoyed the silence… It was cold and the wind was strong, little shelter from it did the trees provide. However, I was not one to be stopped, and so I kept on marching.
The road was rough and muddy, it had rained abundantly. As I kept striding, more and more mud got attached to my boots, thus my legs felt heavy. I was quickly getting tired, but there was no place to rest, I was much in the open, I had to go on. As all of that mud was pilling up and my energy was shrinking, I soon began to often stumble and fall, but each time I found the power to get up and continue. It was getting so cold, it felt freezing, I could barely feel my hands and feet. I was conscious all the time, I could tell I was weak. I was worried, I did not know how long I would be able to resist. What I most feared eventually came about, I stumbled and I fell, yet again. This time however, no matter how much I wanted to, how dearly I struggled to, how dire my efforts were… I could not get up. Out of rage and agony I clenched my fist and smashed it against the rock solid, frozen ground. I had to swiftly clean the blood off my hand so it wouldn’t freeze on it, afterwards keeping my mouth on the fresh wound, even my blood felt so cold… I raised my head and looked forth, but there was no sight of the mountain I searched for, I was so far away… Had I been walking in the wrong direction all this time? Will I never reach the mountain? Is all my suffering, truly, in vain?… Many thoughts as such were crossing my mind, but I never stopped moving my limbs and fingers around, I needed to keep warm, I didn’t want to freeze. Although inevitably, I did think of it, losing hope was something I did not want to allow myself to do, I trusted I would find the power to get up again… Or so I thought, I believed it was me who would never allow hope to die. However, it soon got so cold that I would have murdered my hope, had I been given the chance. In truth, it was hope that didn’t allow me to freeze… As I laid on the ground with my eyes towards the sky, I noticed little white dots appearing all over it. It began to snow, and it was just me, out in the open, company of the snowflakes. I had time to witness them making their way to the ground. I realized they were beautiful, graceful… I could no longer feel the cold, oddly enough, I felt rather warm… Suddenly, it was so silent, so peaceful, I closed my eyes…
I could feel the gentle wind touching my face. I opened my eyes, it was already morning. It had stopped snowing, and strangely, there was no more snow around, it must have been a mere a dream… I no longer felt tired, thus I tried yet again. I succeeded, I managed to get up on my feet and get going. But as I was walking, I felt this unusual need to look back, I kept having this strange feeling, almost like I didn’t know where I was headed anymore…
I finally saw the bottom of the mountain, it was my goal to reach the top of it. And so I began my final effort towards completing the task I had set out to do. Step by step, with each endeavor, I came closer. My arms were shaking, my legs were desperate to crumble, even breathing was rough, but I held on, I held on until the end and I climbed the mountain. Looking forward in the distance, I saw everything I had sought before. Having seen all of it, I smiled, and swiftly turned my back to it in order to start walking in the direction I had come from, because I realized, quite some time ago, that all I truly wanted was just for it to snow again…
A terrible word, one to fear,
the one that says: “desire”.
Not because it’s evil, by nature,
rather in deceit, it holds its danger…
Awaken from a daze,
only to slide into another haze…
The eyes of one, lost in a permanent rush,
will only see blur,
thus, his mouth will only slur.
How then, could one tell what is folly,
and what he desires, truly?
Perhaps, not until a hush…
Slow down for once, let go of the noise,
listen instead, to the silence…
Witness now, your poise,
Having allowed your eyes to see clearly,
do your words now speak, of what you wish for sincerely?
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